I have inside me, a sadness so profound,
It keeps searching for reasons to come around,
Carefully hidden away but always lurking,
Just under my skin it's always crawling,
Wrapping me in a chilly cold hug,
I've given up on finding any drug.
Need a pill of whatever saves a sinking ship,
Wish someone could save me before I slip,
In a downward spiral into a bottomless well,
Where sun doesn't shine and dark thoughts dwell,
If you ask me to explain the cause,
I'll start fumbling with words but then I'll pause.
How to make you feel what I feel?
You'll say 'Calm down' and then I won't reveal,
Nothing happened but I am waiting for something,
Something happens and then I feel nothing,
No one died but I feel like I'm in a wake,
Especially on my birthdays when I am cutting a cake,
And on festivals and on New Year's I get numb,
I pose for pictures while shrouded in a mysterious glum.
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