How is it that people cope with all this emptyness and lonlyness..you live alone..eat alone..laugh alone and yet chose to stay alone..have we lost our ability to stand other people..or are other people that harsh and we'd better avoid them..
I thought it started after I lost someone dear..some comfortable zones..some old homes..but u know what..it has always been there..and it will always be.. I am starting to think that emptyness is mere human..a part of the ups and downs human cycle..
I though something..someone can stop it..but u know what..no one..and nothing can..only I can..and oh it's exhausting..to keep fighting to fill your own emptyness..buy a game..start a course..read a book..take a task..go somewhere..call someone..pick someone's call..clean the house..get a pet..make friends..i think the best way to get over that is to just lay low till the storm passes..sometimes it takes days..some times it's hours..
I wonder is that what depressed people feel all the time..if their storms never pass..as grateful as I am that mine does..as sad I am there is no pain killers for this type of pain..
It resembles headaches a lot..sometimes they are mild and just pass..other times killers that your brain expoldes from the inside out..it just different in that it attackes the heart..and sometimes the soul..
Peak times..during vacations..least noticed when overwhelmingly busy..sometimes it hits during the most crowded rooms.. it's a state of mind..that only one's mind can conquer.. and sometimes despite ur greatest efforts u fail..some numb it with a movie..a song..meaningless shopping..and again fail..sometimes all u can do is let the storm pass..
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