You were never perfect. Always very mysterious, always very confusing. Each time you feel like you said something you shouldn’t have, you push me away. That’s probably what hurts me the most, being ignored by the only person that can put a true smile on my face. Nevertheless, I was never blinded by love, I know you have flaws, I see them, but I decided to love them because that’s what makes you, you.
Your silly smile, your stupid answers, your disappearances and sudden appearances are what make you, unique, and nonetheless the love of my life.
I think that you get the best out of me. When I’m with you I’ll always try to show you my better side. I’ll always try to be nicer, to be prettier, to be funnier, just to get a smile or a compliment in return. That one smile that could turn my rainy day into a rainbow coloured month. That’s why I try to do everything to see you, even if it means I’ll be in trouble later on. I put your happiness above mine because when I talk to you, I forget everything bad that is going on in my life. I forget the tears, the pain, the anxiety, the agony I’m going through. You are the reason, I’m trying to stay strong, the reason I keep on living.
Then again, all of these are things you’ll never know, because those are the words I’ll never have the courage to say. I know we’ll never be ‘us’ again because some people are meant to fall in love but not meant to be together, and it’s okay. I’ll find someone who’ll love me and, as hard as seems to me now, I might love someone else just the way I loved you, with all my heart and devoted soul.
But if there’s one thing I’m sure of is that I’ll never forget you even when I’ll be old and grey. There’s always going to be a part of me that’s going to ache when I hear your name.
There’s always going to be a part of me that will die when I see someone with your same eyes.
Nevertheless, I will look back at all our moments, all our laughs, all our tears and I’ll smile, because without you I wouldn’t be the person I am now, nor the person I’ll be in twenty years.
I hope you’ll feel the same. I hope that every once in a while I’ll cross your mind and you’ll smile too. I hope you’ll remember each silly thing I did to make you laugh. I hope you’ll remember all the times I said I hated you and you knew I was lying. I hope that if you ever get a baby girl who loves to dance, you’ll encourage her the way you encouraged me, and that maybe you’ll even talk about how once you knew a passionate dancer.
I just hope I won’t be a chapter of your past that you don’t want to remember, but a memory that you’ll cherish forever.