To Him

I admit it. It hurts to move on. I didn't expect this moment to come, moving on from the person who made me feel like the most amazing girl in the world, like I was important, worth it or I was someones happiness. I don't want to say good bye but I think it's time to let you go. I don't know what to do. I ran out of excuses to tell my friends why I don't talk about you anymore.

Things didn't end up too well for us, we had our complications. There wasn't a time where we wouldn't fight for what we both want, yell at each other to get the fuck out, or even trust each other, that one of us wouldn't run off with someone else. I made myself believe that I was just getting over you at my own pace, taking things slow and one at a time. But that wasn't what I was doing, I held onto the fact that we would still fix whatever we had, that in the end we'll still run into each others arms. I loved you too much to think that what we had was just some penny I can easily throw away. I tried to fight for us but you didn't help me. 

I then realized that there are still people out there who will not give up on someone like me, who will make me feel important, make me feel loved, make you feel like you are not alone in this world. There are still people who are willing to give time to listen to your problems and stick with you until you get where you need to go and will stay with you even after that. 

I'm scared of letting you go, I'm scared of being alone but it's the right thing to do. We were never official in the first place and you weren't really mine, so I have to set you free and let myself be free. I don't need you anymore to make me feel wanted, important, and beautiful because deep down, I know that I am capable of seeing myself in that way. I laugh at the idea that you were once the only reason for my happiness. It's because I have learned to accept that you are the negativity in my life and that I needed to let you go because you are no longer good for me. And I feel bad for you. I feel bad that you weren't able to see how wonderful I am because I honestly gave you the best of me. Well, too bad for you because never again will I show you that side of me, you had your chance and you blew it. 

But, aside all the things that happened between us, I want to say THANK YOU. Without you and the pain you have brought to me, I wouldn't see the things that are important to me. The things I never really want to lose in my life, the ones who I will not neglect just like how you did to me.