In Your Eyes and In Your Image

Willow woke up to the sound of the little dog alarm clock on her bedside table, playing, ‘Its My Life,’ by ‘Bon Jovi.’ Groaning slightly, she reached out for her phone to check the time, hoping her alarm was mistaken; but when was she ever that lucky? The phone flashed a steady 8:15. When had she after all been so lucky that she might actually get a few more hours of sleep? She HAD been sleeping for the past fifteen hours as soon as she reached home at 4:30 in the evening, but that didn’t seem enough anymore. Her social life had pretty much become stagnant, all she did was sleep and robotic-ally wake up in the morning to go to work.

Grumbling to herself about having work so early in the morning, Willow got up from her bed and slogged across the room to the bathroom where she studied her reflection. Her usual cheery face had lost its sparkle and though still uniquely beautiful, she looked much older for her age. She slightly touched her rather well rounded cheek, feeling quite old as well. The past month had been incessantly tough for her, she had withdrawn from everything except work and all her friends had at this point stopped trying to bring her out of her shell. Even going to work felt like more energy than she had left to give, but a girl’s got to work, right?

She quickly brushed her teeth and washed up, before dressing in a pair of old faded blue jeans and a white tee which did justice to her frame. Willow was not short for her age, she was curvy with perfect glowing skin. Her hair was tied back into a pony tail, her chocolate brown eyes giving herself the once over before grabbing her keys and kit. She was ready to go to work, to another monotonous day, another day where it took her all the effort she had to keep going.

She did not dislike her work, she was a photographer to the Cyprus Mirror and though she had always wanted to be an independent wildlife photographer, this wasn’t so bad either. The pay was good and she got to do what she loved doing, how many people could say that? Though sometimes being the youngest in her department in the office meant she always got the stupidest cases and she was constantly chided at by her boss who loved flaunting the authority she had. That’s why Willow usually hated staying in the office, if she was out and about clicking pictures it was fine but sitting in the office was torture. She was usually sitting in her cubicle praying for lunch hour to come faster.

Thinking of lunch hour reminded her once again of her main source of hurt; something which was much worse than working in the Mirror and having to listen to Mrs. Alvin cluck like a hen. She was reminded that he was no longer there during lunch hours to pick her up from work, take her to their favorite restaurant and cheer her up with his goofy, bubbly attitude. He referred of course, to her ex-boyfriend. He was one of her closest friends and they had pretty much done everything together. He was the one person she trusted completely and she had fallen madly in love with him. She let out a single sigh as she thought about the guy who had made such an impact on her life, the guy that she couldn’t be with anymore, the love of her life, Kyle Jackson.

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The Cyprus traffic was getting worse by each passing day. Kyle had been stuck in the same traffic signal for the past 30 minutes or so and he was getting impatient. He kept drumming the speedometer of the black scooter that he was riding. Every now and then he looked into the rear view mirror to straighten his long curly hair which refused to stay still. Kyle was well built, but not muscular. He was not tall and yet, not too short either. He had just the right amount of stubble and a very crooked nose. His blue eyes were hidden behind rectangular spectacles.

He sighed with relief as the traffic started moving along once again. He had to be at work in less than ten minutes and he still had a fifteen minute drive to the old school which was acting as an aid camp for all those people who lost their homes in the very recent tsunami that devastated the east shores of Cyprus. A lot of people had been injured, killed and a lot more lost their homes. Kyle worked with a social work agency and hence had been actively involved with the rescue and rehabilitation effort. As a psych major, his job was primarily grief counseling, but he was helping out with organizing the food, fund raising and pretty much everything.

He quickly ran over all the names of the people he was supposed to be counseling today, as he rode past at full speed. Keeping busy and helping people out had always had a cathartic effect on him. And right now he needed all the catharsis he could get. He had recently broken up with his girlfriend of three years. It had been one of the hardest decisions he had had to make and though he loved her immensely, he knew he had to make that call; it seemed the only solution at least for now.

They didn’t have to break up due to any problems between them. Three years of being together and they had never got into any serious problems of their own. They were a wonderful couple, good partners, and better friends. The problem however was that they had been star crossed from the beginning. She was a Greek Cypriot and he was a Turkish Cypriot and though that made little difference to them, their parents did not think so. They were against the union on racial and religious grounds. Kyle’s parents especially were very against their son wanting to marry a Greek Cypriot. Soon these family issues started to impact Kyle and Willow’s relationship and things started to go downhill, majorly. This was when Kyle decided that though they both loved each other, this relationship was not working out.. at least not right now. It was tough, but he had to make that decision to end things with Willow and he was not surprised to see that she understood. That was after all what made them such great partners. Even though she understood, he knew Willow was pretty broken up over it but then again so was he.

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Willow James was already having a bad day, just like predicted. She had rushed into the office, out of breath thinking that she was late, courtesy of Cyprus traffic. It would not of course matter even if she was late, seeing that her assignments if any, come halfway through the day. But then again her boss, Mrs. Alvin-the-hen would not shut up if she was late. She walked into the photography department to see that it was locked. Her boss was still not here, so poor Willow had to wait outside the office for thirty minutes for the security guard to find the spare key in his own sweet time and open the department for her.

Another 30 minutes later, the stupid hen came bustling into her cubicle and gave her yet another menial assignment. She was supposed to go click pictures of the victims of the tsunami in one of the schools which was acting as a relief-aid camp. Now she genuinely felt very sorry for those people, and she had personally donated a lot of things for the rehabilitation effort, but clicking pictures of them would really do them no good and by now, she honestly deserved better assignments.

‘Can’t I have a better assignment?’ She had asked the Hen who just smiled gloatingly before saying, ‘Why? The woes of the poor tsunami victims too boring for little Miss-perfect-shutter-speed?’ (Willow had once taken a workshop for some college kids in which she had emphasized a lot on the shutter speed and after that the Hen had her rechristened.

So grudgingly, Alvin had hopped into her bike and ridden to St. Augustine school, the host of the relief camp. Now as she stood in the doorway, she just couldn’t help but curse her boss, the Mirror and her whole life. She walked to the entrance door, taking her camera from its bag and putting her ID card around her neck as she rang the bell.

She was still fidgeting with her camera as the door opened and without looking up, she chanted, ‘Hello. I am from the Daily Mirror to cover the relief aid camp. My boss would have talked to the camp coordinators. My name is –'

‘Willow James,’ finished a soft voice which was all too familiar, sending chills down her spine and causing her heart to jump. She looked up abruptly into the surprised eyes of Kyle Jackson.

Chapter Two

Kyle’s head was spinning. He had come into the school and while he was being confronted by different tsunami victims on various issues they were facing the doorbell had rung. He was still very close to the door so he had opened it and found himself staring at Willow. He watched half in surprise, half in adoration as she blabbed the protocol lines of the Mirror. He had seen her do it a million times and she never really looked like she cared about it, her attention would always be focused on something else.

He finished her sentence uttering out her name, her name that he hadn’t spoken in over a month. It still felt right on his lips. He watched as her eyes dart up to him, she recognized his voice. Of course, she recognized his voice.

‘Kyle,’ she said, shocked.

‘In the flesh,’ Kyle replied. He looked at her, taking in every detail of her. She was absolutely gorgeous, more beautiful than the mental image he had of her. But there was something different about her. Her usual bubbly, glowing face looked tired, worn out, aged. It broke his heart to see her like that, knowing that he had caused the smile to be wiped off the face of the person who he had always wanted to be happy. Willow as Kyle had known her, was always hyper.. Jumping up and down, a mischievous glint in her eyes. Now she looked older, more mature.

He looked her in the eye, willing her to understand how very sorry he was. And as she looked back at him, he could see in those eyes that he fell in love with that, she understood. She always understood. She comforted him with a genuine yet sad smile which he knew was telling him that it wasn’t his fault. She was still comforting him. Kyle couldn’t help but smile back, he never could resist smiling back to her.. He wanted to hold her and tell her that none of it mattered. What mattered was having her with him. But he didn’t.

They both just kept drinking each other in for a moment before she finally broke the silence, ‘I didn’t know you were part of the tsunami relief team,’ she said.

‘Yea,’ Kyle replied slowly breaking out of the daze before repeating, ‘Yea.. Well a lot of grief victims to counsel, you know.’

Willow nodded as Kyle continued, ‘What about you? The Hen give you victim shoot? I bet that didn’t fly well,’ He grinned at her. He knew how much she hated the hen and being given small jobs like this.

‘Yea well,’ Willow replied grinning back, ‘A girls gotta do what she’s gotta do. Aren’t you gonna invite me in Mr. Bigshot Grief Counselor?’

‘Better,’ said Kyle. ‘I’d give you a grand tour. Some of the victims just want some sympathy.. to have their story heard. So if I tell them someone from the Mirror was here to hear them out, it would work better charms then grief counseling, And you can take pictures of them too. Both our jobs would be done then.’

Willow beamed, lighting up her whole face as she did so. It was one of those huge smiles that she gave when she approved of something and was happy about it. Kyle had always loved that and even now, it was like she was years younger all of a sudden.

’Cool,’ she said. ‘I can be on board with that.’

‘Then enter my dear Madam,’ Kyle said smiling too. ‘I am thy humble guide.’

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Willow was surprised how few things had changed with Kyle in spite of everything that had happened. It was like despite all they’ve been through together, they could just revert to being good friends, completely comfortable with one another. They joked normally, made fun of the Hen, chided the Cypriot authority’s lack of dedication to the relief effort etc.

As far as the relief effort was concerned, Kyle was like a god. Everyone came to him for advice, everyone wanted him to hear their complaints, everyone wanted him to hear every bit of detail of what was happening in their life in the camp. After three years of being with Kyle, he could still shock Willow. He responded to everyone of them gently, hearing them out, even when he was in a hurry, giving them solutions, not turning away any of them. Willow wondered how he could do that, the concerns some of these people came up with were completely unreasonable. The relief effort had organized the school hall to be used as a recreation center and a television had been kept there. People actually came up with a complain that the TV was too small for them. It just reminded Willow of Gandhi’s quote about how man’s need can be quenched but not his greed.

When Kyle was done listening to all the complaints, providing solutions to various problems, breaking fights he lead Willow to different people who had to be counseled. And some of these people broke her heart as they laid out their experiences. She clicked pictures whenever appropriate with their permission as Kyle soothed them gently, reassuring them that he would always be here working with them till they see better days.

Willow met various different people in the grief counseling. There was a 43 year old woman who watched her husband of 20 years getting crushed under a tree which was uprooted by the tsunami and her two kids drowning in front of her very eyes. There was a 5 year old boy whose whole house was washed away from its seaside home and his whole family was killed and he himself woke up in the relief camp with nothing left from his life but a few scratches. There was a 14 year old girl who had managed to brave the first round of waves with her twin and just when they were both about to be rescued, her twin was snatched from her arms by the jaws of the mighty waves. She met a 70 year old woman who had gone completely catatonic by the sheer amount of deaths and injuries she had seen to people that mattered to her. She watched as Kyle try to soothe her and ease her into talking without much avail.

It so happened that Kyle did take Willow to lunch that day. Everything seemed normal between them. Willow did not remember feeling so happy in a long time. It was then she realized how Kyle was more than everything a very close friend to her and she just could not imagine her life without him. There was no mention of what happened between them, no sign of it apart from few longing gazes shared on both sides. There was no need for anything to be said, they knew without saying, understood without expressing.

It was around evening when she had visited all the grief victims with Kyle, taking pictures of all of them, promising them that the world would know their story. It had begun to rain heavily by then. Kyle was just about to escort her out of the school when a middle aged lady came rushing to them, frantic with worry. She started blabbing to Kyle non stop and neither of them could comprehend what she was saying. Willow watched as Kyle sat her down and calmed her down, coaxing her problem out of her. It seemed that her 6 year old daughter had been insisting that she wanted to see their home since morning that day. The house in question was not entirely destroyed but it was no longer safe for human habitation and it was near the shoreline so the family had been brought to the camp when all the other victims were saved. The little girl could not understand how or why she can’t go home, so she had stubbornly gone out on her own while her mother was tending to her grandmother.

The girl, the lady said attended the school that the relief camp w as based on, so she knew very well the way to her house but she was immensely worried about her going off on her own to the shore in the rain, especially owing to the fact that more tsunami warnings keep coming in, every now and then. She begged her to rescue her little girl who meant the world to her. She kept repeating, ‘I have no one else. None at all,’

Kyle kept comforting her and assured her that he would do all he can to save the little girl and that she should just go inside and he asked one of the volunteers to make her a strong cup of tea.

‘I have to go help her,’ Kyle told Willow when the woman was gone. ‘She is right. The shoreline is still dangerous and its pouring cats and dogs’

‘I’d go with you,’ said Willow immediately. There was no way she would let Kyle go alone into the shoreline in this weather.

Kyle nodded. ‘We should also take your bike. It would move faster than my pretty little scooter,’ He said as an afterthought, smiling softly.

This was another thing Willow loved about Kyle. She knew he wouldn’t be all macho and tell her she can’t go and its not safe. She knew he would recognize that her being there would be good as they were a good team and got things done better together, He always treated her as his equal and she loved him for that.

She grinned back at him. ‘Yes we wouldn’t want old scooty drowning, never to be seen again would we?’ she said with a soft chuckle.

Chapter Three

How exactly they managed to reach the east shores that night, Kyle could never properly remember. He felt himself go in awe with Willow’s riding skills; the way she navigated through the storm, not to mention traffic they managed to reach the east shore just as the clock struck 6:00 on Kyle’s watch. On the way they had shown different people pictures of the little girl, in case she never did reach the house and was lost somewhere on the way.

The mother had given them perfect directions to the wreck of what was home to her family once. Kyle was useless in finding places, as he had a whacked up sense of direction so it once again fell upon Willow to guide them to the house. The storm was getting worse by that time, so they had to struggle their way through the wrecked remains of what was once one of the most beautiful beach side residence area of Cyprus. Helping each other along the way, they battled through the storm, drenched and freezing keeping an eye on the angry waves which were crashing furiously towards the shore but sticking to its territory yet. The heavens roared with thunder, which disabled their sense of hearing so they pretty much had to rely on instinct and unconscious coordination to make their way through the storm to the house.

By the time they reached the end of the directions the frantic lady had given Willow, they could see the wreck which she had described. It was actually much less damaged than the rest of the wrecks which were washed in. It was still standing and though the waves have damaged a lot of the pillars there was a lot of the roof still remaining. There were no doors and windows of course and the whole house was in pitch darkness.

Kyle and Willow moved into the house shining their flashlights, calling out the little girl’s name. After they had searched for quite some time, they found her hiding near the fireplace in the completely wrecked kid’s bedroom of the house, sitting against the wall, crying to herself softly. Willow scooped in to take her into her arms, as they both comforted her quietly.

After a few moments when they had managed to calm her down, they all headed out of the room to leave when there was a huge bang like noise at the entrance. They quickly hurried out to see that the remnants of one of the four walls of the house had come crashing down with the storm.

‘I think we’d have to wait the storm out,’ said Willow. ‘I don’t think its safe to try and brave it especially now that she is with us,’

Kyle looked outside for a while, considering his options before nodding. ‘Yea, I guess you are right.’ And as if to give its own vote of support for their decision, the heavens let out a huge out cry of thunder and a bolt of lightning right at that moment.

Kyle and Willow were unsure of how long they had to stay there for the storm to pass over so they used various different things they could scavenge from the wreck to cover up the roof and the broken wall as much as they could. Then Kyle found a slightly comfortable spot in one of the rooms where they both sat side to side, so the little girl could rest on their laps, Willow singing soothingly to her all the way till exhausted from the day she had had, she drifted off to sleep.

After the girl slept, Kyle and Willow remained in companionable silence for a while, Willow unconsciously caressing the girl’s hair and Kyle fidgeting around with his phone which showed no signal. An abrupt and thunderous roar of thunder broke them from their state of unconscious pondering. Willow’s hand jumped automatically to clutch Kyle’s. She only realized what she had done after a while and as she made to withdraw her hand, Kyle held it tighter. Willow lifted her head to look at Kyle, who she could just barely see in the darkness. He was looking at her, too and as their eyes met, he said, quietly, ‘I’m sorry Will,’

‘What for?’ Willow asked, genuinely surprised.

‘For everything; for hurting you, for not fighting harder as I promised you I would,’ He replied earnestly.

‘It’s fine Kyle,’ Will assured. ‘I understand, I told you I did. I truly believe you did what you thought was best and I respect you for that,’

Kyle sat quietly for a while before saying, ‘Truth is that I don’t know what is best, Will. I really don’t. Definitely, not this I think.. I’ve been miserable without you Will, that’s all I know,’

‘So have I,’ Will replied tightening the grip on Kyle’s hand. After a moment of silence, she added. ‘Where do we go from here, then? The reasons why we had to split still remains,’

‘I don’t know,’ Kyle said helplessly. ‘All I know is I can’t not be around you. You have become a bigger part of me than I am myself. If that made any sense,’

‘It did,’ Will told him, her voice shaky ‘Listen Kar, do whatever you think is best.. just know that I’d be here. I don’t want anyone else, it’s you.. it’s always been you.. And if you choose to come back, I’d be waiting,’

Kyle blinked back tears as he looked into Willow’s watery eyes. Throat too tight to speak, he just reached out to hug her and she hugged him back, holding on to him like her life depended on it. Kyle gave a sigh of relief that only a man who had found peace after long suffering could give. Willow buried her head in his neck and they stayed together, speechlessly drifting off to sleep.

With morning the storm had gone. The sky had cleared. Willow woke up at 8.15, finding herself in Kyle’s arms. She knew that their problems weren’t over, when this day is over maybe they would go back to their own routines, but she smiled to herself, at peace to be with him right now. Kyle woke up half an hour or so after that, to see Willow looking up at him. He smiled at her, as he wordlessly untangled himself from her arms and called the school to let them know the three of them were safe.

They quickly woke the little girl up and the three of them hurriedly gathered whatever things they had brought and headed out of the house eager to get to the school fast. The storm last night had been terrible from the looks of the uprooted trees and beach. But the thing about storms in Cyprus was, however bad the storm is the next day brought the beauty of a new hope, a new start. The sun was up, the sky was clear and the weather was looking good, the air even smelled fresh.

Kyle and Willow hummed together, as Willow rode her bike back to the school, with the little girl in between them; still half shocked by last night’s events and half interested in the humming that the two ‘grown ups’ were doing. The frantic lady’s happiness was beyond words to see her little girl back safe and sound. She crushed her in a bear hug, sobbed as she ran her hand through her hair, chided her angrily, and hugged her again, laughing out loud. A bit overwhelmed by the level of emotion ongoing, Willow took a picture of the happy mother and child reunited and then it was time for her to go. Kyle walked her out till her bike, both stealing glances at each other, unsure about what to say regarding last night’s conversation.

Kyle broke the silence, patting the bike softly. ‘Oh baby, how much we owe you,’ he said to the bike grinning..

‘Oh you better owe him Kyle Jackson,’ Willow said smiling. ‘He fought battles for us last night. When has your little scooty been able to do that, huh?’

‘Hey she is still my princess. My pink, useless princess,’ Kyle said grinning broader. ‘But then again the bike is bound to be like its master.. in the case of him, in relation to you, that would be never giving up,’

Willow smiled at the compliment, looking Kyle in the eye. ‘You bet I will never give up,’ She said as she mounted the bike, her hand brushing against his which was resting on the handle bar. She did not hug him, goodbye.. she didn’t even utter the word. She looked at him in the eye and he did not look away, as she said very softly but clearly ‘You better not be a stranger Kyle Jackson,’

‘Yes Ma’am, you bet I won’t,’ Kyle replied. She smiled, once more and he smiled back at her as she started up the engine and sped away.

Kyle watched her drive by, in that nearly twenty four hours that they’d spend together, they had not got back together, things were as they were before. He did not claim that she belonged to him and mark his territory and she did not try to change his mind or affect his decision at all. Most things were left unsaid, but understood. And when in that last moment, when their fingers brushed together and their eyes met, they both knew that whatever happened, even though they weren’t together right now he was hers, he would always be hers and she, she will always be his.