What do you think of romances?
Two people meet, drink, dance, kiss and have sex
I had thought all that to myself when I came here to enjoy the city life.
A woman in her fading 30s with lots of makeup to hide my ageing
But it doesn't matter right now, tonight it's about booze and dance and boys and sex
And still I am standing out in the streets looking at the empty sky, thinking what I am gonna do
Ah it was one stupid decision to come here
Yet, I am standing out waiting for something to happen like never before
What do you expect from a woman in her fading days that too from a divorcee
Tring to get my life back on track by sleeping with boys much younger than I have ever dated in my whole life
You must think I'm crazy, well I don't need to tell you about my life. You will get it from the story
And it's fucking fun
But today I feel I am going dry
And I looked up at the sky to find shooting stars
You know, they were fun when we were kids. We used to run behind them and fold our hands to make a wish.
But it's all Sigh! And internal sobbing now
And in The meantime
Out of nowhere like it happens in movies,
I heard a voice
"Wanna chase the shooting star?"
And I turned to see a guy in his early 20s standing next to me, smiling.
Aha! so that's how you approach a woman who is missing on all the club fun and standing outside looking at a dying star because it reminds her of her dying relationship. Well! nice try, it worked. Practically anything works these days.
My relationship left a mark on my left ring finger with 13 years of successful marriage which no more exists
Anyways that is another thing.
But thank god I am not running dry today and I am surely going to pitch my tent in this territory I just found
"Are you sure, you can track it down?" I grinned, eyebrows raised, things I did from my college days because some random guy once told me it made me look cute.
"Can give it a try, I have a truck"
And what do you expect now, huh, sex in truck oh my god, the most exciting thing that you could have in your whole life with a stranger but no I will act sane and charming.
"I have a car!" I said just for the sake of saying. Truck is still better than a car
"Okay then! You wanna drive or me?"
A Whhhat he agreed on a car?? It's okay anyways he'll get a taste of my likes once he steps into my car with self assembled interiors, on which I have Invested my time and maintenance. And I gave him the key!
You must be thinking why I don't Fear this guy? Honestly because I don't mind anything at this point of my life, not even my luxurious car or my life. Everything ends like my relationship ended and I lost my baby! so now no big deal! I am going again off the track. Forget it
So we went to chase the so called stars!
2 hours later :
Literally nothing, car, kiss, music but what am I doing here in a muddy lane sitting on who knows what the heck rocky surface, hoping insects don't crawl into my skirt. I shouldn't have come here to see the man repairing the punctured tyres of my car. I tell you everything ends, this car is going in the trash.
And he is trying his best to get it fixed but we miss this and that but he doesn't complain. Poor thing!
I guess I should have brought my truck"he grinned
"Yeah! you should have "
But wait my car has never been so bright and musical before like seriously
Before this whole puncture thing, it was all so fine
I have been in car with this man who brought his cassettes from the truck before leaving, playing them on record back to back and he had all sorts of mixes
Songs I haven't heard of,
Raps, a hunted thrills, cheap music
And he hums and sings and tries to lip sync the female part
It's all so funny
And all I did was look at him, amazed and happy and giggling
And I told him all through the journey how his record is better than mine will ever be
And he looked intensely and then began this crazy, crazy rap I could ever follow up.
And there were times he missed the beat in his rap, shoot, funny and cute.
I liked what he was doing. I began adoring him.
I eased myself on my seat
" If I had my boy alive he would be like you, into these songs... Life's crazy" I broke out
He didn't look at me, I continued.
"I lost him when he was not even born,it was my fault, my marriage ended. I couldn't save him, I can't save anything not even my marriage."
"Am I losing on everything?" I asked him
And he looked at me again, with that intense look, his eyes into mine. This time didn't sing any song. I guess he sensed my pain.
PRESENT TIME :
But now here I am sitting out of my car which doesn't have a tyre with no chasing desires of sex anymore on my mind
He has finally given up too.
And he came and sat beside me.
"So! No stars" I looked at him with a disappointed look
And he smiled back," I guess not the one we aimed for" he replied
And the world felt to silence, drop dead silence
And then he Began,
'"I think of roses"
And paused.
I looked at him
He gave me a look and began again
' I think of roses
that rest on those shooting stars
Firm, stiff and then when they fall apart
Piece by piece, petal by petal
They screech with pain and agony and fear
" Oh dear star! Are we safe here? "
And the star says nothing but opens up its fountain of tears
And it tries to stop, shhhhhhhhhiii... It goes down, down
And the roses moan and shreak
Help! They shout
But there is no scout
And some little piggies look at them from the earth
They join their hands to pray for the safety of those roses to land safely on earth
And when the star closes its eyes, those piggies think about it twice and do the same
Long live the stars! they pray, fading or alive, but the roses they had to lose their petals and die
and their red blood dropped all over the earth.
And hopes vanished in demise.
Hopes vanished in demise '
And i looked at him. I didn't know when the tears rolled down my eyes. Were they even supposed to?
What did he just tell me?
What did he just quote
Plans, life everything fades because it is meant to be. My child died because it had to!
Why did he say this?
I was sobbing and haunted as if a big stone was being removed from my ribs and it was painful.
"Stop!", I cried
he continued,
' yet everything that happened that night gave little hope on the other side
Piggies got new way to bow and bide
News spread all along the vines.
And everyone who sees another falling life thinks it is their way to make a wish of life.'
And he flashed at me beautiful smile while I was drenched in tears figuring out the depth of the lines he had quoted. I
He then went to the car, put in a cassette
This time it wasn't some crazy wobbly song
But a romantic one
And gestured me to dance.
And I danced barefoot in the muddy lane, keeping up with his steps
That night I did went dry but with tears and hopes in my eyes and less pain than I had carried before
I guess he just gave me a reason to hope, maybe the dying stars should not affect me, maybe he brought me on the other side where hopes are still alive.
Maybe my child Is still alive, the way he was, and I don't have to regret or feel the guilt that he died
It's not that bad with eyes bowed and the pain running
Maybe he's happy somewhere
Maybe I have the chance of my life to dance with him and I'm doing it
Who knows?