For my future first boyfriend

Hey, hope your doing fine. I'm saving myself for you... I mean I want you to be my first and last in everything. I'm 19 years old and still don't have a boyfriend. Maybe because they don't make me happy, they don't make me feel special. 

Sometime I feel so lonely that I ended up crying. There is no one I can talk to. Yes, I have my best friend but I know they will never understand me, they will give advises that I ended up crying again. I don't understand them   as they don't understand me.  Wish you I can see you now..  how I wish I can hold you and talk to you. Coz I feel lonely..