Hoping for the First to be the Last

My story wasn’t like a fairy tale that started with a once upon a time and ended happy ever after. Well it did start with once upon a time. He was a cherished friend of mine. I have considered him as my Best Friend. The only boy Best Friend I ever had before. That was during our High School days. I think it was more than 7 years ago.

We had a nice friendship story however, I already had feelings for him and suddenly I just got the news that my girl best friend liked him, until they finally had a relationship. Well As far as I can remember, I was too hurt. How can I ever live seeing both of my best friends happy while I am being silently killed? Having me as their friend, I was always with them even during their date. I can’t even resist from them.

Until one day, they broke up. I have to be honest I was half happy and half sad. And yes! I’m not proud that we had a relationship just after my girl best friend, but then, I loved him. I’m glad it was okay with my girl best friend. However, he was meant to be away from me when he got to go to a university. It was just fine at first, but I have felt the coldness of his affection as days went by.

One night while I was lying on my bed, he texted me words I never expected to come from him. He broke up with me. He was my first love who became also my first heartache. I really cried a lot that night, when one day, I have moved on. I also went to a university same as where he is with the same course that he toke.

It was so hard for me to see him at first, it seems like my heartache is flashing back every time I see him. My temperature always rises but it was like destiny had always been making a way for our path to cross. I got used to it and finally moved on. I had passed through a lot and I even had relationships with other guys. I was then hurt over and over again until I decided to just stop.

Meanwhile, I got in touch with my boy best friend recently; I think our great friendship is being restored. However, I did never noticed that I was slowly falling for him again .I’m honestly longing for his Love but I am not so sure that he can give me back the same Love I have for him. I really don’t know what to do about it and I need other people’s advice. Thank you so much