If feelings truly were fleeting,
I'd rather feel nothing.
I'd rather close my eyes,
And be ignorant to what
Knocks to be recognized,
Than to have them wide open
To see and watch clearly
The tragedy of you and me.
I'd rather not open my mouth
If what would come out
Are words which I fear of saying.
I'd rather stay far and distant,
If that's what it takes
To keep you from hearing
The loud and awkward music
That my heartbeats make.
I'd rather be deaf
To my own thoughts
If hearing them means
Realizing the bitter truth
Which I cannot bear to carry.
So please understand,
That I'd rather be lonely,
If this is the only way
To protect myself from
Getting lonelier.