Launchorasince 2014
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I'm a mess

I doubt myself, I'm agitated by the world

I don't see myself moving, I know I'll get hurt

My heart pounds, when I lend an ear to their opinions

I feel ashamed, why am I at this position?

I don't feel pretty, is it okay?

can you help me to shed these heavy regrets i weigh?

I want someone to have proclivity for me, 

requisite feelings, as deep as the sea 


I felt complete, when I was younger 

I didn't believe the magazines until the boys told me about their hunger

so I had to get the lipsticks, covertly

cause moms don't understand, do they? how silly 

I got dresses, found makeup

I let the unwanted brushes touch my skin

It was all the starting then, I was 13

little did I know, being a girl is not as easy I thought it would be

I remembered hiding it all when my mom asked about it, all quickly


to look pretty or feel, decide that first

I don't want to quench any man's thirst 

there's  never been a way to make this easy 

I want to set these emotions on fire, uneasy 

will I ever be like the models in magazines 

those models, those perfect pieces of art, asks the teens

I feel like drowning and I don't feel I'm enough for anybody, see

I don't feel complete anymore, plain-looking is that a word for me?


will I ever be/feel/look pretty?

I'm a mess indeed. 

I don't think anyone can ever love me 

not lovable, I guess. I'll be what I want one day, I believe. 

or maybe, I'm just, just ill.

will anyone ever, make me feel complete again? I'll throw the sleeping pills.

iloveyou, I'll neve hear these 8 letters, 

oh look, under my bed, there are my torn up feathers.