I thought it was okay.
I thought it was fine thay I was getting used to enduring pain.
I thought I was doing well when I learned to smile despite feeling hurt deep inside, like it was the most normal thing in the world.
I thought I did mature a lot when I started taking in sword stabs as though they were little needle piercings.
I thought that saying "I'm okay" in spite of feeling so torn apart was a sign of bravery.
But then I realized how it was not okay at all.
While appearing all happy and considerate of everyone else, I subconsciously put aside the one that I needed the most.
While I took in everything that was thrown at me, as if it was some sort of a sport, I forgot to ask my most important person what she really wanted to do.
I hope she forgives me.
I hope she still knows deep inside that I love her-
That girl who used to be me.