Is Ten Years Enough?

"After all this time, do you still love him?"

My best friend asked me one time when we we're having a catch-up on our favorite café bistro.

I just looked at her in the eye and sighed. "I never love him." I told her for the nth time and she nodded. But I don't think she is that convinced with my answer. She was always like that whenever we had this conversation about my crush. But she will always ask me on the next days if I already moved on. It became our little debate since.

"Come on. It's been ten years and you're still infatuated to him! Don't tell me it's just a crush because it's absurd." She ranted.

Last friday, I saw him again in person after years of stalking him only on his social accounts. I wonder if he still remember me. Maybe. Maybe not.

I smiled at my bestfriend before uttering my answer.

"Because love is a strong word. What I had for him may be more than an infatuation, but it was nothing close to love. I have never been jealous whenever he had a new girl nor I had the urge to tell him what I feel. I only feel happy for him. For his adventures and success. I am forever be his supporter - his fan that will always cheer him among the crowd. What I have for him is a strong feeling that will forever be a reminder that once in my life I have felt something this strong, so real and so long, towards someone I would always consider special."