Its been awhile. I never thought I'd get this far. I always wondered how it would be different. How the future would change and what changes I'd face.
The battles are the same but the days are different. My future looks a lot like my past if I thought about it. I don't want to think, my mind is my enemy.
The more I think the more it feels like It's Back. Those emotions, those feelings, and just those Thoughts. The same thoughts I had before, just slowly creeping back in my life.
I know they never left. I just buried them. Ignored them to the point I felt they were gone. Here now they resurface. I'm struggling to control it, its been so long since I had to deal with them. I might have forgotten how I dealt with them in the past.
How do I move? Feeling glued to the past. Stuck in an endless circle. A circle of emotional turmoil that is cause my emotional damage. Damage I never thought was bad. But, what do I know? I am the only perspective in this huge world of judgement. I could never possibly know the answer. To fix what damage I may have caused myself.
How do I tell the difference?
It's Back to the point my words are poets, and my thoughts are rhymes. But I don't have a rhythm to tell my mind. I'm not a bard who can do these things.
I'm just a man. A weak man filled with thoughts.
Just Thoughts.