Muscle to Mind

"What a terrible thing it is to wound someone you really care for and to do it so unconsciously."

A copy of Haruki Murakami's Norwegian Wood lay in my hands as I pondered over the lines I had just read.
"A terrible thing," I repeated after myself as I placed the book on the table and picked up my cup of Hot chocolate turned cold.

Twenty-five minutes had passed since my arrival at the café. The corner I had picked for today provided me with an excellent view of the beach and the flock of seagulls over the horizon. The humidity in this part of Bombay didn't bother me much, I knew meeting him had always left an everlasting impression on me.

I had been swirling the cup as I heard his husky voice, "I'm sorry to keep you waiting. I'm sure you must have read a book in the meantime." He pulled the chair on my right and sunk into it. "I'm having a terrible time dealing with this strong relationship I share with my foot injury," he said letting out a soft sigh.

"Hadn't I warned you before?" I said glancing at his left foot firmly draped in a brown ankle binder, "Isn't this the second injury you have had in the last four months?" I asked him.
"You're aware I love playing," he said trying hard not to sound curt.

Since his school days, he was active in sports. And now, he loved playing football and cricket on the weekends. At his school's alumni meet, his team had won the cricket tournament. Fifty-two runs in twenty-five balls scored by him, helped them earn the trophy. Then, in the month of October, they had a Football league, a sprained ankle had left him bedridden for few days on the first day itself. Having plenty of feats under his belt, I knew, for the love of the sport, an injury would never deter him.

Nevertheless, we debated on it till the time our orders were served. A bowl of piping hot Alfredo pasta for me and a portion of oatmeal for him. "No cheat day, is it?" I teased him when he hogged on the porridge at once.

I sat back and continued to observe him between my bites. When he had settled down on the chair comfortably, his bulky frame had caught my attention. It reminded me of the time when his lean body had suggested of increase in work pressure. But a year on, today, he looked his best. The blue raglan T-shirt accentuating his strong shoulders, well-defined muscles, comfortable gait, and a confident demeanour. His grit to achieve his goal amazed me. He had once mentioned it was his dream to build a fine physique and stay in the best of health. I could see his dream bearing sweet fruits.

I poked fork on the tender penne as I asked him, "Since when have you been working out?"
My question caught him off-guard. He thought it was a mockery and toyed with it for some time.

"Tell me when was the first time the thought of achieving an athletic frame crossed your mind?" I repeated.

Considering the seriousness of my interest, he replied, "Ever since I watched Salman Khan dance on the song 'Oh Oh Jaane Jaana' I knew, I wanted a desirable physique like him," he paused to scoop the last bite of the oatmeal and continued, "I decided to wait until I turn twenty-one and join the gym. There's no stopping since."

I smiled back at him, perhaps, I had failed to notice him fidget with the turquoise gem bracelet. An identity created by the dynamic Salman Khan. I should have known when he smirked at me, yet I asked, "Has it always been him? Or were there others who inspired and motivated you into bodybuilding?"

He rubbed his chin thinking and said, "Though I don't compete, I have been building the body for roughly a decade and there are definitely some things that make it appealing. Everyone has different motivations for the things they do. Arnold, from the Pumping Iron, for example, probably associated lifting weights with the success of being the best, most famous bodybuilder in the world. The close connection between the act of lifting weights and the knowledge that he was the best around, probably felt quite nice."

I shifted in my seat to face him and asked, "What is the first memory of your gym days?"

He stared at the waves crashing on the pristine sand, "On the first day of gym, I remember, I trained myself beyond my body could accept," he laughed cherishing those memories, "The next day, I fell sick. It was then I realized, it is a routine, and the habit has to develop slowly."

He saw me slouch in my chair as I listened to him. When I didn't shoot more questions, he continued, "Weight training makes me feel positive and strong. It makes me confident about myself and shapes my overall personality.
"I don't know why, the day I don't train, I feel uneasy and weak." He motioned me to pass the glass of water. "I become restless and too annoying to work peacefully. Don't they say, 'A healthy mind is in a healthy body'?"

"Laziness freaks me out too!" I said almost loudly.

"I know right? However," he gulped the water and kept the glass back on the table, "I feel lazy during mornings but these days, I have managed to kill my laziness. As my work out demands twelve hours a day, I make sure to hit the gym early on."

I was aware of his hectic work timings, arriving home late in the nights had become a routine. "It must serve as a stress buster, I'm sure," I said with an approving nod, "What's your schedule for every day then and how do you manage it?" I asked him, curiosity now at its peak.

"Are you interviewing me?" He looked at me earnestly.

"No!" I said with an assurance, "I'm genuinely interested to know more about your regime."

He took a deep breath, "Okay, I'll tell you." After pausing for a few seconds, he said, "I begin my workout with warm up. Stretching exercises and cardio which includes five minutes of spot running."

"You must have planned each day?" I asked as I knew how it worked. I had been body weight training myself for over a year now and had my own timetable for the circuits. "Monday?"
"Chest and triceps"

"Tuesday?"
"Back"

"Wednesday?"
"Legs"

"Thursday?"
"Shoulder"

"Friday?" I asked, catching my breath.
"Rest," he laughed out loud. "Continue, you're doing well."

"Saturday?" I asked.
"Freehand"

"And finally Sunday?" I heaved a sigh.

He flexed his left arm forward flaunting his biceps, “My strength lies here."

Every time I observed him, I discovered, his chiselled muscles wore the hard work he endured. It takes consistency and dedication to stay true to your training. I remembered the days when I could plank easily for more than seven minutes at a stretch. When I had indulged in HIIT and Bokwa, my body's endurance had hit a definite level. But once the routine broke, I found it difficult to catch up on the pace.

Taking note of the consistency, I asked, "How do you manage to keep yourself motivated despite the stress bludgeoning you down?"

"For me, weights are a constant. It is something you can control. Perhaps, it is not always that you lift well on a given day, but you do know you can, for the most part, always try. It is something you can commit to and then a manifestation of the desire to always improve oneself plays an important role too," he was weighing his words carefully, "Getting personal, as a kid I had a big mouth and was a weakling which led to some bad encounters. Maybe the baggage from that as well as being a pudgy youth makes the act of doing something like lifting which actively moves me away from being overweight again, all the more appealing.

"I believe, when you want something, you go get it. A thorough mental preparedness is required before you begin to train intensely. You need to have your goals set. Once you have you ulterior motives set in advance, your continued determination helps you try and push yourself into achieving the unattainable."

The time clocked fifteen minutes past six, as we sat in comfortable silence for some time; the sun had begun to set and the sky painted a mesmerising coral hue. My stomach craved again for another shot of sinful hot chocolate, I called for the server and ordered my third cup. Meanwhile, he kept himself hydrated with water. Although, he didn't have any habits, neither smoking nor drinking carbonated beverages. As far as I recollected, he loved milkshakes. Caffeine and tea had never excited him and he had long ago given up on junk food too. I had assumed this day would be no different but he surprised me again. I noticed, neither did he check the menu card for the variety in milkshakes the café had to offer nor did he order one.

"You don't like Pani Puri?" I had asked him once bewildered.
"I don't remember when was the last time I ate it, maybe a decade ago," he had replied matter of fact.

He recognised the delusional look registered on my face. "I'm not ordering anything else. I used to binge eat sometimes before but in the past nine months, I have trained religiously, putting equal efforts in eating a balanced diet," he said as he smiled.

I looked at him sheepishly. He had expected me to put forth the next query, but before I could begin, he blurted out, "Fine, you want to know my diet chart too now?"

"Your diet constitutes a major role in keeping you fit. No amount of strenuous exercise will help you achieve the great body if your meals are anything but proportionate,” I shrugged. Nevertheless, my words were too judgemental to bring him down. 

He began to speak once I was done, "Quite so, I agree. As you're aware, to build muscle mass, you require abundant protein intake alongside weight training, and I make sure I receive it from dietary sources," he checked if I was comfy enough in my seat and continued, "My diet consists of right amount of chicken, eggs, cottage cheese, rice (once a day) and chapattis with Oranges and Bananas daily.
"Breakfast includes organic milk and Greek yoghurt post workout," he paused breaking the link and frowned, as he saw me counting my fingers. 

"Wait," I said, as I flashed my forefinger, "The cottage cheese, you mean... Paneer in lay man's terms?" I asked and roared with a devilish laughter again. "You make everything sound luxurious!" I said teasing him more now.

"No!" he exclaimed ignoring the satire, "I do have cheat days where I eat wholeheartedly because I could burn the excessive calories the next day."

Whether he paid no heed to sarcasm or it didn't bother him, I couldn't care less whenever I had to mock him. He always made me comfortable in my own skin. A kind soul coupled with honest generosity and humility was a rare occurrence; he felt home to me. It then dawned on me, in the next ten days he would fly to London.

Keeping continuity in the conversation, I asked, "What shall you do while visiting abroad on business trips?"

"I carry my gym accessories along to train myself for twenty minutes before I leave for client meetings." He replied tapping his fingers lightly, "The key lies in being progressive with your workouts, as your body tends to get used to it otherwise. I try to beat the routine and keep evolving to prepare my body for maximizing the gains."

"Nothing really stops you, I should have expected that," I said shrugging my shoulders. "And then you resume immediately once you're back?"

"Umm, no. Once I'm back home," breaking his knuckles, he continued, "I follow compound exercises for a week.
"Which includes squat variations, explosive pulls, deadlifts, Bench presses and overhead press variations, pull-ups and rows."

I could only let out a 'Wow' in exclamation because, I felt guilty of being too casual towards my own body sometimes.

In the minutes that followed, he showed me various photographs clicked in succession over the years. Every picture I saw scrolling down intently, I realised, he had dedicated his free time to caring for his body completely. His love wasn't limited to his physique, he had taught me lessons on self-love when I dealt my worst. I could see his gleeful face beam with a realisation. A realisation about his dream approaching at a fast pace.

I looked at him for a long time smilingly. An embodiment of love and peace stood before me. You often come across wannabe guys flaunting their beefed up bodies but he was beyond comparison. His elegance lay in his presentation, in his demeanour, in his kindness and in his self-discipline.

An expert voice as his, echoed in my ears, "For you, you must find what motivates you. And I mean TRULY motivates you. Why do you want to look more muscular? The more visceral the answer, the better. What things gnaw at your mind while you sleep that might be put to rest by having a more muscular body? What pisses you off that the stronger body could help with? Find out why you really want to look fit and muscular and you will find the answer to your lack of motivation. Then focus on these thoughts. Clearly engrain in your mind the 'why', of why should I lift weights and build a stronger and a bigger body. After that, the better questions and stronger wills shall follow. This goes hand in hand with your life too."

The grit begins from the scratch, plan your goals, imbibe well-researched strategies, if you hit the bottom, work through it, find what works the best in your favour. Have faith in your abilities and confidence in yourself. You're what you're because you believed in yourself. Continue doing so, you will have achieved most of your aspirations. Learn to channelize your thoughts, as they dictate your actions leading to either an achievement or a disappointing failure.

That evening, when we left, his dream felt more of my own. Maybe someday, I'll acknowledge him for the impact his presence laid on me. Although, it had been enough for today.

..... ....

Writer's note: 

Before I began to write this piece, I thought of experimenting with a topic as different as fitness motivation. I took it as a challenge for me to go beyond my realm of story-writing and culminate freewriting and essay into a short story. The views expressed here are that of the first person alone. They in no terms mean to deconstruct the art of story structure nor glorify anything in particular. 

I hope, the readers enjoy this quick read as a stressbuster and/or for anyone who draws inspiration from it anywhere on the scale of 1 to 10. 

Yeah! I know, there lies a fitness freak in some of us, this one is for you all! :D

Thank you! :)

Cover Image courtesy: Zain Sayed. (Thank you for letting me use the picture for representative purposes, highly appreciated.)