My Dream Guy

Before I met him, the description of my dream guy was simple -- taller than me, darker than me, not very handsome (just with a very nice nose), & of course, I must feel that he likes me too.

That's all I ever wanted. I could fall deeply in love with anyone having those four simple requisites.

I've thought and decided about that since a long time ago. I had faith that everything else won't matter so much. I just need that person to like me. Then, I would be more than willing to do whatever to make things work between us.
I was looking forward to it.

But I was never in a rush. I was doing really fine by myself. I was never attracted very much to anybody because of those standards I've set. Of course, the last requisite is not as easy as the first three.

Then one day, I saw him.

In front of my eyes, my dream guy, possessing all the physical requisites, and looking overly beautiful in my eyes. Dangerous -- I thought.

I set those standards but I never really tried to imagine how he would actually look like. But when I saw this guy for the first time, I just knew it.

It's him.
I was frozen.
I couldn't stop staring.

He was far away from me but we were standing on the same ground. There were so many people around us, in between us, -- but eventually, everyone and everything was blurred.

Everything --
except him.

I was captivated.

I was standing still, as if time had stopped in my world. But he was moving. I watched his every move. I just watched him from where I was standing, frozen. I watched him walk in front of me. Then, farther and farther away from me.. until it was just his back.. I watched him as much as I could.. until my eyes could no longer reach him.. until I lost him. He's gone.

I saw him again.. the second time.. the third.. fourth.. fifth... The circumstances were all the same. Far away, I watched him. His every move. As much as I could.

I even figured where he lives!
I know I sound like a stalker, but no, I am not.
It's just part of the 'as much as I could' idea. I could say, the circumstances were favorable. I haven't gone out of my way then.

Not yet.

I loved watching him. I fell in love with the idea of having that special someone that you look forward to seeing everyday. My every sight of him made me very happy.

~~~

He is not very tall but he looks like he is because of his lean, non-macho, but good-proportioned body.

His eyes look larger than those of everybody else I see around him. His dark wide pupils are clear even when they are deeply concaved between his protruding nose bridge and brow bones.

Aside from his adam's apple, his proud nose and jawline emphasized his manhood, and his brown skin makes him even more masculine.

He used to always have the clean haircut, but lately, he is letting his black wavy hair grow longer than usual. Now, his hair is long enough to cover his eyes whenever his head tilts downward a little.

Even the most gentle wind blows his hair into an annoying mess. I hate it. His new hairstyle is only making his hair look really soft. Nobody would even notice it before. But now, it captures more attention. In short, it made him more attractive. I feel bothered every time he runs his fingers through his hair.

My goodness. He's lovely.

~~~

Came the day we first had a conversation, I did my best to act as normal as I usually am.

But that day was an exceptional day. It wasn't a normal day. Not for me. Not for him neither.

He came to me.

He was from a distant place.

He had gone out of his way to approach me. I was trying hard, putting on a poker face. But deep inside, I was in a mess. My heartbeat, blood flow, the words jumbling my mind repetitively.

"Wh-what's going on? What is this? What's with him? Is this really happening? Is this real? Or am I dreaming? What's he doing here? Why now? Why's he speaking to me like this? With this smile on his serious-looking face? What's happening? Had he figured me out? Did he caught me staring or what? Was I obvious all these time? What made him come to me like there wasn't anybody else around? Why me? Why out of all the people in this room? Why did he walk his way here from a distant side of this  room? Passing by everybody else and choosing me? What? Why?"

Before that happened, we've known each other's faces for a long while already. I knew his name. But I didn't think he knew mine. I was contented watching him. I wasn't expecting anything.

******
I'm publishing this now, cause I don't think I can continue it. Been a year.
I can't remember anything about this anymore.