Searching for Solace

The waves came roaring in and then died at the shore while kissing her beautiful feet. The summer breeze playing with her long messy open hair. Standing alone by the beach in the most enticing atmosphere. But something more enthralling than the beach, the sea, the sandcastles, the sunset ; was her face. A content smile had spread across her face. Her eyes filled with hope and appease. She had been standing there for a while alone. Then after a few minutes, finally someone came and held her hand. She looked lovingly at them and kisses their hand. It was almost like she had found everything she could ever want and now nothing could make her happier than she was right now.
Just like we can't see how the beginning of the waves are, but the ending is always beautiful. Similarly no one knows what the beginning was like for her. What all obstacles were confronted by her. So let me take you to the beginning, the very beginning.

This alluring young woman was born on a cold winter night to a single mother in the unforgiving city of Delhi. Proudly named Ruhi Raghavan as a homage to her maybe late father Raghavan. She had a happy and prosperous childhood. Her mother did everything she could to give her an affluent life.
Her schooling was also good regardless of her adverse situation. She was an above-average student with determination and willpower. She got good grades and often came in the top 5. But there was a void in her life. Her father had gone missing around 4 months before her birth and he was never to be found. Till date, whenever she questioned her mother about her father's disappearance her questions were averted. She wishes desperately for answers. Sometimes she even wished that her father was dead so that at least she could move on but on other hand she hoped that someday her father would return so that she could know what it was like to be loved by your father.

Years passed and she graduated High School. Now, New adventures awaited her.  She had to study hard to Crack the difficult entrance exam for her dream job. Her aim to be a lawyer. 6 months of rigorous studies and perseverance in hopes of appearing in the CLAT. And to no one's surprise, she cleared it in the 1st attempt.
A month later she joined her college in Bangalore.  Her college life was like poetry; Full of symphony and love. She flowed through the semesters like a serene river. There was no doubt that she would be hired by a good law firm soon. And so she did. Life was good for her. Life was indeed treating her right. Nothing could go wrong. Or at least That is what she thought to herself. But you know, Life is brutal. It can hit you hard out of nowhere and you'll be on the ground with gut-wrenching pain.

That gut-wrenching pain came to her when her mother was diagnosed with stage 4 cancer of the stomach. She barely had 6 months to live with chemotherapy. Ruhi was broken from within. She Never really got to see her father and now her mother was on her death bed. She was lost; Darkness had engulfed her. Not a ray of light could pierce it or maybe she was not allowing it to enter. Hope is the last thing you lose in life. And she had lost all hope. She was desperate to do anything and everything for her mother. And when she asked, Her mother wanted just one thing for her daughter, for her to get married and settle in life. As Devastated as she was, she could not let her mother die in vain. Little did she care about herself.  She said yes to the marriage. Not even interested in looking at the boy's picture or qualifications. It was almost like she had no desires or ambitions. As she said, "my mother has taken every decision of my life and she has never been wrong." Her only demand was that she should get married as soon as possible. Or at least Before her mother's health declined.
She got engaged to a young handsome man in the next 15 days. And was about to get married in the next 15. He was a young businessman named Uday Rao. He genuinely was a gentleman who respected her as a person. But Ruhi was way too 'Zombified' to notice the good qualities and loving nature of Uday. Had anyone who knew her, looked at her right now would be heartbroken. She had become a shell of the person she was. But something was about to change. She was supposed to get married in 5 days. But something even bigger was brewing it's way into her life.

She got a letter at her office. It was addressed to her name and the sender was Mr Raghavan. She was in a state of utter surprise and overwhelming anxiety. She couldn't believe her eyes and read the name again and again and again  frantically. Finally, when she calmed her nerves, she opened the envelope. It was a handwritten letter. A letter from her long-lost father. It read as follows,
" To my dear Daughter,
I know even if I ask for your forgiveness a million times it would not lessen the pain you must have faced for the past 26 years. I missed you each and every day. Not a day passed by when I didn't look at your picture and wished to hold you in my embrace. Your mother sent me many pictures every year. I have seen you grow. Indeed you have grown up to be such a beautiful young lady just like your mother. I was heartbroken when I got to know that she was diagnosed with cancer. I know she Doesn't have much time left and that's why she wishes you to get married. But my child, it's your decision to make. It's your life. I know you love your mother and want to respect her last wish. But you are not some cattle whom we can give off to the first person who comes up. Please take the decision wisely. I wish I could be with you right now but I can't. Don't try to find me. It will be the best for you. Please listen to your heart and make the choice. You don't need to marry anyone right now if you don't want to.
Don't worry. I have taken care of your expense till now and I will take care of your every financial situation further. So you needn't worry about a thing. Don't do anything under any fear or pressure.
Love you so much. I am sorry for not talking to you for so long. I am sorry for abandoning you.
If you can forgive me, it will be like God's blessings.
Your father,
Rajiv Raghavan"
With this letters in her hand, her eyes blurred with tears, her cheeks burned with a surge of anger and her heart ached so much so that she felt like she was going to die. Every moment of her life was a lie. She had a father who watched over her but she could not meet him. A mother who refused to tell her about her father. A child who lived her life thinking that her father went away because he didn't like her, a child going to every school event without her father. A child stuttering every time someone said, "who is your father". She didn't know how to feel. She was angry, she felt betrayed, she was sad, and somehow also happy.
For a few minutes, her mind went blank. She didn't know how to process anything. And after this,questions flooded her mind.
"He saw my pictures?"
"He looked over me and mom?"
"Mom knew he was there and didn't tell me?"
"He Doesn't want me to find him? Why?"
"Why shouldn't I find him?
"Why wouldn't he come home?"
"Why wouldn't he come when mom needs him?"
"He Doesn't want me to get married? "
"Who is he to stop me from getting married?
He was never in my life. How can he come into my life now and act like he has a right over me?"
"Why won't he come to me?"
"Why won't he love me?
She started crying inconsolably.
On hearing this, her boss entered her cabin and asked her if she was fine. Her boss was a very understanding lady who acknowledged the importance of mental health. She let Ruhi go home for the day.
She walked out of the building and stood still by the sidewalk
She was confused, to say the least. Should she go to her mother? Should she confront her? Should she put her dying mother on a pedestal? Should she even believe the letter? She has no memory of this man who claims to be her father. Lost, she didn't know what to do, so she just decided to go home. 

She started walking towards her house. Nothing could grab her attention, no sound creeping over her ears. She just marched lifelessly down the gloomy road. Then suddenly a familiar face caught her eyes. Uday was chatting with her mother at the door. She walked into the house with a fake smile on her face. Her mother was worried about her. Never had she left early from work.
"Are you unwell Ruhi?", asked her mother.
"I'm fine", she replied with a feeble smile.
Before her mother could ask anything, she said, "I'd like to talk to you Uday. Can we please talk? Alone?"
He sure was startled. But he replied, "Yes of course. "
She led him to her room leaving the worried mother alone in the hallway. She closed the door, turned towards him and plopped down on her bed. Tears flowed uninterrupted from her eyes. She started bawling her eyes out. Uday stood there confused and worried and didn't understand what to do. He was flustered. He tried to ask her what was wrong, but somehow couldn't form complete sentences. Then finally he got down on his knees and looked her in the eye. She looked at him with her tear-filled eyes. Though it was blurry, For the first time in forever she had looked at him. His eyes had so much love and affection. His face was masculine, yet so soft. His brows furrowed with tension. His hair lightly brushed his forehead and those lips asking her if she was fine with the most affectionate voice; raspy, but affectionate. She finally felt like she could cry as much as she wanted and he would take care of her. He sat beside her and gave her his handkerchief. She took the neatly folded peice of cloth and dabbed her tears dry. He asked again if she was doing fine. She shook her head in 'No'.

She wanted to tell him everything but didn't know how to. She didn't know if she should pour all her problems onto him. She took out the letter out of her bag and threw it on the ground. He got down and grabbed it.
He opens it and immediately shrieked," your father is alive?"
Ruhi looked at him and gave a slight chuckle. "Imagine how I feel", she says.
He sits beside her and they both sit there in silence for about 10 minutes, but it certainly felt like a millennium. Then Uday got up suddenly, startling her. She looked at him. Confused and worried looking for an explanation.
"Ok. So what did you decide?", Uday asked. "What?", she exclaimed, "what to decide?"
He cleared his throat and said," will you confront your father?"
Ruhi was caught off-guard. She stammered and was searching for words.
He continued, " I know you want to marry me for the sake of your mother. And I know you didn't care if the groom was me or any other man. But I would like to know one thing."
Ruhi nodded in yes and looked at Uday.
"Do you like me? If not as a lover, atleast as a friend?", he asked.
Flustered by the question, she stood up abruptly. Her face burned up red and her eyes were covered lightly by her eyelids like a beautiful doe. She walked to the window and opened it exclaiming that the temperature was unusually hot. Without answering his question, she starts telling him about the fact that she wanted to find her father before her mother passed away. Patiently Uday listened to her without a word of interruption. She didn't have to answer him, her eyes had already conveyed her message to him.
And then he got up,  kept his hand on her shoulder and said," don't worry, we will." 

She looked intently at him. His eyes were full of compassion and that beautiful smile of his filled her wretched heart with warmth. She smiled back at him. He left the room leaving Ruhi standing there confused about her feelings. She was feeling something she had never felt before. It felt funny in her gut, like butterflies, and she had this warmth radiating from her chest, an unintentional smile adorned her face. She went to her worried mother and hugged her, instantly calming her down.
"I am fine mother. I just came back because I wanted to talk to Uday."
Her mother hugged her back and sighed with relief.
A knot was building up in Ruhi's gut. She wanted to confront her mother, but felt like it was not right to make a woman who was on her deathbed, to go through such a hard time. So she didn't.
Ruhi left her mother's Company and headed to her room. She changed into her pyjamas and lay down on her bed. The moment she closed her eyes,  Uday's face, looking at her with love and concern. Her face felt hot and a smile spread across unconsciously. Was she in love? I guess not. But for the first time, she was experiencing the feeling of being valued, the feeling of being loved and cared for,  the feeling of being in a safe space.
She had dinner soon after and then peacefully drifted to sleep.

Early morning she was woken up to a phone call. She fumbled to hastily pick up the call so as to not wake up her mother. It was Uday.
The both greeted each other and Uday replied with enthusiasm, "I found your father!"
Ruhi was caught off-guard. She was too dumbfounded to reply. All she could say was, "where?"
'He used his name on all his government documents and he used his credit card for purchasing one of our products. I can't find his address, but I can find his number.'
There was a deafening silence after that for a minute or so. Uday broke the silence and continued,'You could talk to him...'
"I don't think I can talk to him on phone.', She said," I might just go into a blind rage and, start shouting or maybe I'll just cry. I don't know."
There was another long pause, after which a statement was made from Uday's side, ' I'll be there with you. So don't worry. Even if you cry, or shout, or panic, I'll be there to calm you down and hold you.'
A silent, "thank you " was muttered by Ruhi.
They both bid each other goodbyes and kept the call.

Ruhi somehow slid out of her bed feeling lethargic and devoid of all motivation. Her mind was too occupied with the questions of 'what if' and,  'how'. Sluggishly she got ready for her job. Even at her firm, she spent most of her time staring at the number while pondering over the thought,
If she should try to find her father. But being the perfectionist she is, nothing came above her responsibilities and duties. She really is an amazing attorney.
Before she could realize, it was half past 6. Her senior passed by her cabin and hollered at her,"Miss. Raghavan!"
Ruhi looked up startled.
The senior continued, "You're going to get married in 3 days. Go home and get some pedicure or manicure done. We'll take care of everything. "
A smile popped on Ruhi's face. She was so busy with all this turmoil that she forgot that she's supposed to get married so soon. Ruhi got up and addressed her senior," Yes ma'am" she said sheepishly.
After her senior left, she gathered all her belongings and headed out. "I'm getting married to Uday." She thought to herself. She never really had given it a thought, but today, she realized that she was going to be a wife, a daughter-in-law and soon-to-be Mrs Rao. Just when she was about to get in her car, a message dropped in. It was Uday's. Unknowingly a smile adorned her beautiful face. She opened it.
It read,' Ruhi I talked to your father. And I need to talk to you.'
Immediately the smile faded and a gloomy feeling enveloped her. She dialled his number and waited for him to pick up the call.
'Hello', he said.
"Hi", she replied.
'I'm assuming that you have read my messages. So I'll just get to the point.
When I called your father, I greeted him and told him my name. But before I could say anything to him, he stopped me mid-sentence and asked if I was the Uday who was marrying Ruhi. I was startled, because how could he know that. But I replied with a yes. To which he just said that he would never let you marry a random guy whom you met 15 days ago and he will convince you otherwise. I was so confused. I barely had a conversation with this man and he's already threatening to take you away from me. I understand that he's your father and all. But I don't think that an estranged father has the right to tell you what to do and what not, to do.' He paused waited, for a few moments and continued,' I am sorry. I shouldn't have said that. He is your father after all.'
Ruhi cleared her throat and replied slowly," It's okay." She continued," how did he know your name? And why does he bother if I marry you or not? And you're not a random guy! I like you. "
There was an audible gasp from Uday's side. This is when Ruhi realised what she had said. For the first time, she admitted that she liked Uday.
"Um... I... I meant... what I meant was..." She struggled to find words.
'It's okay!', he said. 'I like you too', he said in a low tone.
None of them spoke for a while, and then Ruhi asked," Did you ask his address or how to meet him?"
'I did!', Uday exclaimed, 'He just said that he didn't want to meet me and he cut the call.'
Ruhi sighed. They both bid each other goodbyes and she cut the call. She sat in her car and drove back home.
On her way, she realized that it was almost impossible for her father to know about Uday, until and unless her mother told him. She was now determined to confront her mother.
She was going to enter into a new relationship, a new life, and a new beginning. She didn't want the ghosts of her past to haunt her anymore.

She drove back to her home and was welcomed by her mother. There were some guests at home, looking at saree and jewellery. It was the house of the bride after all. They dragged her into choosing a saree for her mother. Ruhi chose a beautiful maroon Saree for her mother. And then proceed to choose the matching bangles as well. A while went by making small talk and obligatory conversations. Then she finally got the chance to go to her room and change. She wanted to talk to her mother, but little had she realised that it would be a lot harder than she thought. She was used to questioning witness and suspects, but when it came to her own mother, how could she put her in the Dock? She didn't even know how to approach her. She eventually decided to sleep on it.
The next day she woke up. Her leave had started. As much as she wanted to lie down and just sloth, she had to get going.  A lot of preparation were left and somehow she had to find time to talk to her mother as well. She went to the washroom and got ready for the day. "Mom", she called out. But no response.
"Maybe she's out in the garden", she thinks to herself. She went the kitchen.I'm making tea mom. You want a cup?", she asked.
No response. Now this made her nervous. The kitchen was almost so close to the garden that one could hear the sizzle of the tadka. She went out in the garden only to find it empty. She scanned it again, and much to her dismay, her mother was not there. She hurried to the washroom, no sign of her mother. She barged into her room and saw her mother lying on the bed. A calm spread her mind, looking at her safe. But it lasted only a few seconds. To her horror, her mother lay there in her vomit and blood.

"Maaa", she shrieked.
She tried to wake her up, but she was unconscious. She checked her pulse, it was weak, her breathing was low. But there were signs of life. She sprung into action. She called an ambulance. It would reach in around 5 minutes. Meanwhile, she called Uday. Panicking, holding her mother's head in her lap, she sobbed. Uday didn't even ask her anything. All he said was,'I will be there in 2, minutes.'
The ambulance reached and the first responders were carefully placing her mother on the stretcher when Uday entered the house. He rushed to Ruhi's side. He grabbed her by the shoulder, supporting her. Her petite body automatically leaned on him and she broke down. Calmly he talked to the First responders about the hospital. He informed them that he would follow them in the car and his wife would go in the ambulance.
They agreed and hurried her mother to the ambulance. Uday turned Ruhi to face her. He looked at her and said,' You go to the hospital in the ambulance, with your mother. I will be right behind you. You're not alone. You got it?'
Ruhi nodded yes. He led her to the ambulance, helped her get up and then before turning to leave, he held her hand, squeezed it a little and said, 'it will all be just fine.'
They hurried to the hospital, where her mother was admitted. Ruhi and Uday waited in the OPD filling in all the details and obligations. Then there was wait. Ruhi sat there beside Uday just staring at the floor. Many thoughts were racing in her mind, yet somehow she was absent-minded.

"Ma'am", the nurse called out.
"MA'AM", she called out again. Before she could call again,  Uday called her,' Ruhi?'
She turned to him with dead eyes.'The nurse', he said.
She snapped back to reality and abruptly stood up. She was i informed that her mother needed a blood transfusion and they needed her signature. She signed the papers and came back to settle beside Uday. She buried herself into his chest and asked," Is my mother going to die?"
Uday didn't have an answer for this. He just place his hand on her cheeks and wiped her tears. "Uday will my mother die?", She asked again sobbing.
He didn't know what to say. He just held her tight to himself. Tears started from her mournful heart and dried into his shirt. He didn't know what to say to her. What do you say to a child whose mother is fighting for her life in the ot? She clenched onto his shirt and unbeknownst to her, she fell asleep. Uday carefully placed his jacket on her while they waited for another hour.

The doctor came up to them. Uday carefully woke Ruhi up and they both stood up. The doctor smiled. "She is out of danger. It was a complication of her cancer. I'm sorry. But I guess you're aware of the situation beforehand. I think you know that she might not live very long. I'm sorry.", the Doctor informed them. Ruhi hugged Uday as she sighed with relief. The doctor left and they headed to the ward.
Her mother lying there. Still not out of the anaesthesia. She walks to her and saw her lying there with a tube sticking out of her neck, a cannula piercing her hand, an oxygen tube in her nose. Somewhere deep down she was ready to let her mother go , but today; looking at her like this; just broke her. It was going to be a million times harder than she had thought. Uday held her by her shoulder. She looked at him, and he reassured him. She calmed herself and sat down by her mother.
Uday proposed to stay the night with her mother.

Ruhi returned to an empty house that somehow looked bigger than usual. Traces of the 1st responders shoes were still leading to her mother's room. There was still blood on the sheets. She went to tidy up the bed. Before she could even go near the bed, she broke down again, and somehow held herself back up. She removed the bedsheet and in the process, a piece of paper fell. She set the bedsheet aside and bent Down to pick it up. It was stained by blood, yet it was legible. She opened it. It was addressed to Rajiv Raghavan. It read as follows,
"My love,
This is the last time I'm writing to you. I'm getting the feeling that I'm going to go soon. I haven't told Ruhi, but I've been vomiting blood once in a while in the past few days.
I never thought I'll go like this. I know you don't like the fact that our daughter is marrying so soon. But you have to understand that this guy will take care of her and be by her side through everything. I don't want her to stay alone after I'm gone.
I just wish you could be there at her wedding to give her off. But I guess you won't be able to. Can you do that for me? Just think of it as my last wish. Anyways, I'm going to tell Ruhi the complete truth about us. She deserves to know about her father. Who will tell her, once I'm gone? Hope to see you on the other side.
Love you still.
Yours Radhika"

"So maa really did talk to my father about almost everything.", Ruhi thought to herself. She picked up her phone and dialled a number.
"Hello", answered the person.
"Dad. It's me. Ruhi",she replied.
There was silence for a while. Then she said," Mom is in the hospital. She fell terribly sick today morning and had to had an emergency surgery. "
"Radhika is hospitalized? Will she be okay?", he asked panicking.
"She is out of danger. But may need observation for another day." She replied.
"Do you need anything?",he asked.
"Yes!", she said," I need you to meet me. My mother wrote a letter to you, and i think she would like for you to receive it."
There was silence again. This time he spoke," okay. " he proceeded to tell her his address.
They decided to meet the next morning at 11.
She cut the call.
Kept the letter in her purse and went ahead to clean up the house and prepare dinner. She called Uday and told him everything. He understood the situation and said that he would take care of her mother till she returned from her meeting with her dad. She slept relieved that there was someone to take care of her mother.
She got up early the next day. She got ready and headed to the address. The roads seemed similar, but she didn't know why. The further down she went, she realised indeed she had been here. She didn't remember when and why but she did come here. She took a left turn and was left dumbfounded. It was an old temple where she would frequently come as a child.
And a temple that her mother still visited up until she fell ill, if not weekly, biweekly for sure. How did the roads led till here!
She got off the car and dialled her father's number.
He informed her to just come into the temple and head to the back door of the outhouse adjacent to the temple.
She did as told. And stood in front of a house.
The name read: Pandit Rajiv Raghavan.

She was about to ring the doorbell when a hand patted her shoulder. She turned to see a man in his early fifties. He looked like a pandit,yet somehow handsome. "Ruhi", he said in an empathetic voice.
"Father?", she asked almost so slowly that it was inaudible.
He nodded in a yes fashion.
He led her into the temple in a secluded place, it was seating arrangement umbrellaed by the dense banyan tree. They both sat down with a noticeable distance. She fumbled through her purse to find the letter and finally, after a decent amount of rummaging, she pulled out the letter. She held it out to him. He looked at it with dismay.  "Is it her blood?", he asked with a trembling voice.
Yes,  was the reply.
"How is she doing now?", he inquired with concern in his voice.
She informed him about her health.
"You still don't have to marry a random guy", he said in a stern voice.
Ruhi looked at him baffled, almost in disbelief.
He, who left her, her mother, didn't even visit her at the hospital, never once held her hand, never called her, never said that he loved her or her mother. And now, he dared to tell her what to do and what not to do!? She was not having it.
She got up from her seat.
Turned to him and said," Uday is not a Random guy. He is there in the hospital with the mother of your child, while you sit here. He is the one who held my hand in my times of need. He is the one who calls to check up on your daughter. He is the support I need. So you don't tell me that he's a random guy. "
Her father got up. He was about to say something when he was interrupted by a woman in her late forties," Listin dear, the breakfast is ready."
Her father acknowledged her presence.
She proceeded to ask," who is this young lady?" Then directed her gaze to Ruhi and asked," are you fine child? You seem distressed!?"
Before Ruhi could answer, her father interrupted, "darling she is a poor girl whose mother is not doing very well, So she came to find some inner peace."
The lady looked at her with empathy and sympathy and said,"don't worry child. The good lord will take care of your mother."
She then went back to the house.

Ruhi looked at her father with disgust. She thought her whole life that her father was a good man with bad situation. But he was a man who was married, had a family, had a whole life, yet he impregnated her mother and left them. Her father ashamed, looked at the ground and said, " I really do love your mother and I love you. But the situation was..."
He was stopped by Ruhi," Please don't. Don't tell me a sob story of how you were in a bad situation and whatnot. I thought I'll finally find peace and reconciliation if I found out why you left us. But now I realise that it was your choice. I'm not sure why my mother loved you so much. I don't know why she loves you still. But she does love you. I didn't have a father since birth, I don't have a father now. I don't need a father later as well.
My mother has put forth a request in the letter. It would make my mother happy if you could do it. And if it comes to me, I don't care about it. "
She turned and left the area. She didn't even turn back, because she didn't want him to see her cry. As much as she said that she didn't care, it hurt her. It hurt her to know that her father made a conscious choice to leave them. That he never wanted her mother as his wife. That he still wouldn't acknowledge her as his daughter. It hurt her. But she didn't want him to know this.

She drove to the hospital where she saw Uday putting lotion on her mother's chapped feet. Her heart couldn't take anymore.
She went beside him and held his hand. He was startled, but soon he held it back. Her mother was asleep. The were discharging her at around 4 that evening.
They both went out of the ward letting her mother rest. She told him everything. He patiently listened without interrupting. When she was done, he held her face in his palms, lifted it up and looked directly in her eyes and said in a calm voice," You're so brave. You're so strong. You did good. You did so good. It's okay. You don't have to go through hell again and again. I'm here for you."
Ruhi was too emotional to respond and Uday understood that. He wiped her tears and took her to get herself some lunch.
They both had lunch, talked a bit about their wedding and a bit about her mother. Then they headed back. Later when her mother was discharged, he helped her mother to get into bed and was about to leave when Ruhi called him. He turned to look at her. She stood a few feet away with a loving look in her eyes. She smiled at him, and he smiled back with love. She walked towards and stood just a few inches from him. This was not the first time they were in close proximity, but today, right now, In this moment, it was different. His heart started to race.
She came closer to him. He didn't know what to expect. She held his hands in hers. She raised herself, inched closer to him , closed her eyes and kissed him. He kissed her back. Before they realised, they were kissing each other passionately.
Abruptly there came a voice," You're getting married tomorrow, do it then."
It was Ruhi's mother. Embarrassed Uday hurried outside. Ruhi stormed into her mother's room, but Before she could pour hellfire on her mother for interrupting her kiss, she felt ashamed and ran to her bedroom. That night they both barely slept.

Then the next day came. Her house was full of people. There were her friends, family, and coworkers. There was buzzing everywhere. She was sitting in the center getting her Mehndi done. It finally looked like a house with a bride. She looks over her shoulders at her mother. She sat there feeling emotional as well as ecstatic at the same time.
Ruhi was happy. After a long time, she was experiencing happiness, just pure happiness.
Time passed by sooner than she realised. Her mother still had a few health restrictions, yet she dropped a few dance steps when the girls were dancing. A few hours later the mother daughter duo finally got alone time. Ruhi placed her head on her mother's lap and said softly," Mom I found you letter."
"Hmm", is all she replied.
"I met him. I gave him your letter",Ruhi said.
"Okay", she replied.
"I don't know why you love a man like him. I don't know why you won't just hate him or punish him. But I guess you don't have to explain yourself.", Ruhi spoke almost as she choked on her tears.
Her mother didn't reply for a while, then planted a kiss on Ruhi's cheek and proceeded to reply," Love is not something that can be reasoned with. I loved him with all my heart. We were young when I met him. I knew that he would be the only man I'd ever love. I wanted to marry him. But I guess he didn't. I got pregnant soon. And he was supportive throughout the pregnancy. I still had hope that he would accept us as his family. But soon after you were born, he married a girl of her cast. He didn't stop taking care of us, but he didn't accept me, or you. I didn't want you to live in this world thinking that you're a child from a illegitimate relationship. So I lied that your father was missing. You now know, that I kept meeting him. He never really acknowledged my presence. All we ever talked about was you. He really loves you. I don't know why I love him still. But somehow, my heart and mind still believes that he would have chosen me had the situation been different. I still believe that he loved me. But I also know that it might be possible that he never really loved me. He was just bound to this metal ball because of a chain he fathered. In sorry for lying to you. I'm sorry that you had to spend your childhood without a father because of my mistake."
Ruhi got up abruptly and stopped her mother from saying anything further.
"You loved him. You gave him your everything. You waited your life for him and you never lost faith. It was never your fault. You Raised me well. You never let me be behind my peers just because you were a single parent. Never say sorry for being an amazing mother.", Ruhi said while hugging her mother.
Their intimate moment lasted only for a few minutes. An aunt entered the room and informed that the beautician was there for the bridal makeup.
Ruhi wiped her mother's tear. She settled her into her bed and let her rest while she went for her make up.

Meanwhile Uday was getting ready to leave for Ruhi's home with the 'baarat'. He stood infront of the mirror,  adjusted his sherwani a bit. 'I can't wait to see you Ruhi', he said slowly. A faint smile adorned his handsome face and a gentle blush spread along his cheeks. His best men entered the room and saw him standing by the mirror.
"Bro don't stand there smiling remembering your darling. You have to leave soon. Your wife is waiting for you!", they teased.
Uday along with his family reached Ruhi's abode. Ruhi entered the mandap. She looked like a princess from the television. Her beautiful pink lehnga hugged her body in the most elegant manner. Her face adorned by nose ring and mangtika. Her eyes when lifted up and looked at Uday, his heart skipped a beat.

She sat down beside him and the procession started. Then around the end the priest asked," may the father of the bride now give her away"
Abrupt silence fell. It was awkward as well as sad. But this silence was broken by Ruhi's mother, "her father died long ago. I was her father since birth. And I'll be her father today."
Ruhi smiled with pride as her mother came up to the dias and gave her away. The couple looked at each other with love when the priest announced them as husband and wife. They both bid all the guests good bye and thanked them for joining them in their happiness.

They were now Mr. And Mrs.Rao. But unlike any normal couple, they would not go for a honeymoon. Nor would Ruhi leave her mother and go to Uday's house. They had made a joint decision to stay with Ruhi's mother in her final days. They helped her through the horrors of the nights when she couldn't sleep because her insides were bleeding into her lungs. They helped her through the delirium of the last few days.
But it was always difficult whenever she would be in utter pain and look for her love. It was difficult to make her understand that he man she loved, didn't want to come and see her in her final days. They knew that she wouldn't survive even a few more days.
They tended to her wound, tried to feed her,  tried to keep her happy. And eventually she succumbed to her illness on a cold November night while deep asleep. The found her lying on her bed peacefully in the morning. There was no pain on her face. She was finally free. Ruhi sat beside her lifeless body and held her cold hands and said,"I love you mom. I love you so much. I love you. Mom. You know that I love you. You know that right? I'll always love you. You'll always be loved by me. I love you so much mom" She repeated this I guess another 10 times before  Uday held her and supported her while she got up.
"We have to let her go", he said. Ruhi broke down and grabbed his hand. He hated to see her cry, but somehow couldn't stop her from crying. He guided her outside and called the priest. Soon the house was full of people again. But this time, it was for a grim reason. The funeral was smooth. Her mother was gone. They came back to their house and felt like they would go in and find her mother cooking something in the kitchen or watching her favorite serials. But it was hollow. It was just a house. It wasn't a home anymore.
The decided that it would be better if they sell the house and move to Uday's place.
Before they left, Ruhi sat down on the stairs one last time and said," my mother waited her whole life for that man, sitting here by this staircase looking into the oblivion hoping that she might see him one day. But he didn't even bother coming to her funeral. I guess he never loved my mother after all"
Then after a few moments of silence ,she got up and headed to her husband waiting for her in their car.

Later that week they decided to go to their honeymoon. They went to Andaman group of islands. They reached their and were mesmerised by the beauty. It was almost like they entered an alternate reality. The walked the beaches where the salty winds brushed her hair and the sun kissed her cheeks. Time passed by and it was around 5 pm. The sun painted the sea and sky red. Uday went to get a corn on he cob for her as ahe stood their while the waves were kissing her beautiful feet. A content smile had spread across her face. Her eyes filled with hope and appease. She had been standing there for a while alone. Then after a few minutes, finally Uday came and held her hand. She looked lovingly at him and kisses his hand. It was almost like she had found everything she could ever want and now nothing could make her happier than she was right now. She was exactly where she was supposed to be.