"james, I need to tell you something", she pulled me by my collar, whispered in my ear those 8 letters and I lost myself, that was the moment she won, I lost myself to her. she was beautiful, angel, yes an angel she was. that night, she held me so tight, and all I knew was this is exactly what i wanted, this is what's right. by each and every passing second, I fell deeper into her trap.
I still remember the day I met this angel, in the rush of the New York city traffic, she paused my life when my brown eyes met her blue ones. I knew, in that very moment, she's a tornado. little did I know, she felt the same. after having a terrible experience of dating, I promised to my fellas, I'll be single. my ex, sara, she was such a psycho. an overly possessed human, who just made me feel grisly but this blue eyed lady, is an angel, I lose myself when I look at her. she made me feel amazing, simple amazing.
it was midnight, we were walking down the lane. me and this blue eyes lady I was talking about. she, she is magic. just magic. I din't know she felt the same, and when I did, I held her tight as well. that night was magical, the streets were empty, it was a full moon night, the fresh wind was flushing away the stress I had, everything was dark and all I could see was her beautiful little face, I loved her then, I love her now and I'll love her every single day till I bid farewell to this world.
it was our engagement day, 2 years ago. to be more precise, its been 2 years, 2 months and 12 days, I still remember each and every moment with her. she was on the call, she was so so excited about our engagement, my parents loved her and we just couldn't wait to tie the knot, she was talking about how she dreamt of this day from the moment she met me, and how much she loves the yellow roses I sent her in the morning, she was laughing, she was happy, her laughing sound was just magical, that's all I wanted to hear for the rest of my life, she sounded so happy, beautiful. and then there was silence, I screamed, I yelled, "hello? lara! are you there?" I could feel that pain in my chest, I was scared. I wanted to hear more,I wanted to know if she's okay, I wanted her and then, I got another phone call, a terrible one.
I rushed to the hospital, you were there, in that gorgeous white dress with yellow roses in your hand, lying there, my world stopped right in that moment. I didn't believe my eyes. you were there, lying there, people were crying, your mom was in shock, your dad was crying at the hospital entrance, my parents were sobbing right behind me, I was there standing still as if someone fired a bullet on my chest and tied me with hot chains. I was bleeding from within, I gave you my heart, my heart stopped working that day.
I still go to your favourite cafe every sunday, I order your favourite coffee, that I hated, I drink it just to have you for that moment, just to feel your presence. I go to all the places you took me, trying to get myself back because I lost myself to you.