Silent Talks

“Without a word, without a sound

Inside my heart, and all around.

I want to tell, and it is true

Without a hitch, I fell for you…”

She was speaking something with her beautifully sculpted fingers. For a moment I stopped searching for symbols, I just admired her. Her hands were moving, flowing like a contemporary kathak dancer. Her eyes were speaking more to me than her hands. In the middle of all this, suddenly, she winked, and I surrendered.

She soon realised that I wasn’t concentrating. She snapped her fingers, and I came back from a dreamy world. She frowned in despair, but I still found her cute. I hugged her, and kissed her on her cheeks. She was mad at first, but not for long. After a moment she smiled, wrapped her hands around me. It was bliss. It was all I wanted, from the moment I met her.

Now the story how I met Meera is a bit mainstream. But every Love story must be told, because every tale of love is beautiful in its own way. It makes peace inside the person who encounters it. You start to believe in Love. You hope one day, someday, you too will fall in Love, someone will fall for you. And all that fictional stuff you believe to be only in books and films, will be true. Your life will be a story in itself.

It was a comfy December night. My semester had just ended on the previous day. I had to reach Dehra, I had to reach my Uncle’s wedding before Nyuteer, or the Tilak ceremony. After all, how can one miss one big-fat Indian wedding? With all the sweet and savory food, the menace with cousins, and attending the council of drunk uncles and grandfathers; it was the perfect start to a much awaited vacation. My journey was really tiring. I was sleep deprived, plus I was really-really hungry. The only meal I had in my two-day journey was a plate of samosas. Actually, I didn’t have a good meal for a very long time. Hostel food never savored me.

The first thing that I wanted to do after reaching my destination was to lie on the bed, and sleep till noon. And so I called one of my cousins to show me to my room. I did not want everyone to know that I had arrived, and I made him swear he didn’t speak a word too either. But you know how it is. You arrive at a place where all your relatives are, and you don’t meet them the moment you arrive, they mouths starts to bulge. But I cared less. The only person I wanted to, and had to meet was my cousin Alisha. Obviously she was a lot closer to me than everyone present at the event. So I started searching her. I arranged my luggage and descended the stairs to find her. It was going to be a quest I knew, as her phone was switched off. My luck!

There were girls and women weaving garlands in the veranda. But she was not there. I looked for her in a few rooms, but she was no where to be found. I was rolling my eyes around the hallway when suddenly, my eyes bound to a girl. Not some ordinary girl, a princess, goddess from some place, a heaven I was not aware of. It was not some seductive waist, sexy legs or a make-up face that I was dazzled by. It was her eyes. For the first time in my life had I seen such magnificent eyes. They were lively, childish you can say. I don’t know what was so special, they weren’t blue or green, just black. But still I was stilled at them. They had a naughty charm, and also some innocent grace. Her eyes widened, bloomed, on seeing me.

“Hi! Have you seen Alisha somewhere? Alisha? A small girl with large spectacles?”

She laughed hard. She laughed the typical way by covering her mouth with one of her hands, just like most girls do. Trust me I had seen girls giggle like this before, but this was different. I began to laugh with her. My smile was hiding most of my blush. I hoped it was.

But she did not reply. She looked at me again in my eyes, her laughter was damped. She knew she had to answer me. But she did not say anything. Rather she waved a goodbye and went the other way. Seriously? First you laugh at my joke and then ignore me? Okay. Its fine. She was a stranger, a beautiful stranger. I’ll meet her again. She isn’t going anywhere. Or what if she does go somewhere? What if I never see her again?

“Hey wait.”

“When you smile, when you laugh

The night turns into something new.

And I think of a million thoughts

A million ways to say to you…“

It was the perfect scene for a movie. The stars and lights illuminated the hallway. The floral wedding decorations and oil paintings created a royal feel. I turned to look at her. She wore a saari with a bandhini around her waist. With every step, I thought I was going to lose her out of my sight. I saw her hair, waving at me, bouncing off her back randomly, but beautifully at her every step. Was it her bandhini, or her walk, or her scent? Why was I drawn to her? Only some background music was missing. Actually I was humming a song, I don’t remember which one though.

Was it Love?

I followed her till I regained my consciousness back. We had reached back to the veranda. She kept down the plate she was carrying, and sat next to my grandma. What was she doing along with my grandma? I’ll be doomed if she turned out to be one of my cousins. God please no! I looked beside her. It was Alisha, making floral garlands. ‘There she is!’ I smiled. “Oh destiny, luck, constellations, gods and goddesses! Please no!” I exclaimed.

I panicked and went straight to my room. It was not because I lost interest in that girl. It was because I was scared to know the answer. Somehow anxiety overtook my tiredness. Next morning I bumped into Alisha, it had been a year since I last met her. “There you are! So long!”

We hugged, we laughed and we chatted. It took us a long time to catch up. Then somewhere out of nowhere she asked?

“So are you seeing someone? Or do you like ..?”

“I do like some girls there, but the thing is that, no one dates there. Every girl I ask to is scared of falling in Love. Everyone wants to be casual.”

“That’s sad.”

“Yes exactly! By the way. Who was that girl yesterday helping you with the flowers?”

“Oh.. Oh.. Oh.. Wait.. Let me grasp a breath here. You like her!” she started laughing hard. “You saw me yesterday at the veranda?!”

“I didn’t exactly lie”

“So you like her? My brother’s in L-o-v-e!”

“No! Not like that.. I mean.. I just wanted to know.. I was curious.. Just that..”

“You l-i-k-e her!”

“Okay a bit. Yes I like her. But who is she?”

“She’s my friend from Delhi. We met….”

After that I did not listen to her. The only thoughts that resonated in my mind were these,

“Oye Hoye! Yes! Yes! Turn up the bass! 1, 2, 3, Go!”

“She is not my cousin! Yeyyy!” At one point of time maybe I even planned our first date, my proposal and our wedding. After being on cloud 9 for a while I descended back on my feet.

“..and that was why I invited her to come with me at this wedding. She’s pretty right? Or should I say pretty Hot?” she laughed harder.

“Yes she is pretty ‘amazing!’”

In the evening Alisha called me

"Hey! 5pm be ready. Got some shopping to do. Byee!" and hung up.

So at 5pm I got ready along with a scooter. As I was waiting for Alisha at the front gate, she entered along with the girl! Her! That one! To all the questions running in my mind, she had just one thing to say, "Lets go."

Meera and Alisha took another scooter and were leading the way. She navigated through the lanes sitting on the back seat, while Alisha rode the scooter. Meera wore a white top and black jeans. It was the first time I had seen her hair tied in a ponytail. Elegant! There were the supports on the scooter, but she choose not to put her feet on them. She probably wore slippers that day because I clearly remember seeing her feet gliding along the way. Beautiful! After a bit of tussle of the Indian roads, we stopped at a shopping complex. 

I was determined to impress. Alas, my heart was in that girl! I had never been the kind who could flirt. I always tried to limit my contact with a girl in my school days. I don't know why, its a long gone reason. I became a different person. I wanted her to talk to me, I wanted to make her laugh. I parked my scooter right next to her's, and said the first logical arrangement of words that I found flirtatious, and funny.

"Ye per zameen per na rakhna, maile ho jayenge..”

Just as I said this, I realised ‘Why did I say that?’

“She struck an arrow in my chest

As notoriously she laughed.

The stars, the moon saw in awe

And the Milky Way gasped…”

There was magic in each day at the wedding, after all it was with Meera! All the cousins and friends had arranged for a campfire in the mountains the same night.

In just one day, I got to know her. Well not completely, but I felt very close to her. Maybe she did too. It was difficult at first, and it came to me as a surprise, but it was alright. It was just slow. But I was up for it. It took me some time to grasp, but I finally could talk to her.

The coal crackled and the woods lit. The incandescent lights reflected from her face. I could not see her eyes though, but I could see her form. She was beautiful, her soul was innocent as a child. I could see her hair, feel them as they fell on my shoulders. I felt her breathing, those slight, little moments while she inhaled. I tried to limit my breaths, because every time I inhaled, her head used to slide. So I took small breaths and exhaled very slowly, trying to make her head comfortable on my shoulder. It was caring, yes, but more than that it was funny! No matter how hard I tried, those accidental coughs and instantaneous sneezes would destroy all the warmth I created.

Next morning we met at the same place. I don’t know why Meera had invited me. But as long as I was spending time with her, I didn’t care.

“Hi! You’re good?” she said.

“Yes. Fine!”

“I know an amazing place. You’ll love the scene! Follow me.”

And she began leading the way with her joyful enthusiasm. ‘How can you be so lively?’ I thought. We crossed some roads, trekked some distance and there we were. The place was really breath-taking. The sun had about an hour to set and the breeze was so refreshing.

“Its so cool up here.”

I could see down the forest. The trees grew on the inclination, forming a blanket of life. At a distance was a small lake of some sort. The waters weren’t much deep but the span was quite large. We walked together towards a small abandoned house. After a while she ran towards the waters. She dipped her hands and felt the water.

“Too cold!”

Just as she retreated, a bird landed near her feet. She gestured excitedly. The bird was indeed fascinating. I walked towards Meera. Just as I was getting closer, Meera bowed down to admire the bird, and it hoped to a distance. I bowed down and the bird flew away. We looked at each other and laughed.

The talks continued for a very long time. We both had a lot to say; relationships, our friends, school, teachers, crushes, sports (that was a bad idea), music, food, future, life. I did not realize that we were lying down on the grass! And just as I noticed it, so did she. We sat. We were smiling. She lifted a wisp of hair and slowly placed it behind her ear. It was a perfect moment. She looked straight into my eyes, as if she had seen something wonderful. I was confused, yes I was! I was trying to read her face. Should I kiss, should I not? I had never felt like this ever before. My heart bet faster. My eyes blinked slower. Just as they closed,

we kissed. It was heavenly.

After a moment, we turned. The bird was right next to us, gazing.

Sometimes in life, time makes improbable things to happen, things you never expected to be true. Meera is someone I will always cherish. The girl in a lot of my poetry, my stories, my first love, my first kiss!

I still visit there. Even though the seasons have changed, the leaves have shed and it has snowed. But the bird still visits me, in the same place we used to lay in the White forest, beside the lake house. It has been years, I visit the place again only to find the bird with the siblings.

I don’t know if she’s seeing someone …