The fucking tears flow, the words don't.

Sitting alone in this square shaped room, with three walls covered in things i love, things that give me positivity and joy everytime i look at them. The remaining with a closed window.
The window trying to block the sound of music playing outside. Its probably a wedding. There is happiness somewhere really close.
I can feel the merriment in the music, in the sound of people talking, dancing and enjoying.
My room's window, trying its best, trying hard to soundproof the room. Its there, rigid, closed shut, not moving, even though there is so much noise on the other side. Its there still, calm, quiet, its there to protect, its there,it is always there. i leave, come back, its still there.

I wonder, like the window, what else static and rigid do i have in my life. Just like my window, what else is always there. Just like my window, what else is rigid, still, quiet and is protecting me, even with other things affecting it. Most importantly what else is trying hard and trying its best even with the situations against it.

I sit and reminisce. I sit and think.
I realize, nothing.
I'm still confused, i'm still having a question in my head.
"Are you there to listen?"
And in the past few days i observe, the answer is always, "No."

Then plays the sad music, then it plays right in my head. It freaking touches the strings again. I feel the goosebumps. How am i able to relate. I have experienced nothing, how can something mean so much real than it actually is.

And now, my eyes are all blurry, all teared up. Why is the song so relatable.
And now i recall the memories, both good and bad. I recall it all. Something so normal, so obvious, yet changed everything. Just an instance and everything is different now.
No reason to feel this way, yet i feel.
It will go away. Hopefully it does.

Do i have anyone who understands me. Do i have anyone, who will just listen.
The answer i am getting every time is a No.
Always a no.

Like always, this time too, i'm left alone.

And now the tears finally flow out of my eyes, runs down my cheek. Now there is a flow.
Now finally, i am crying.
After a long time, i am crying. For a reason i know, but am unable to put in words.
The fucking tears flow, but the words don't.