Unstable.
Defined as prone to change or not stable.
Also defined as prone to psychiatric problems or sudden change of moods.
One minute it's ice, the next it's water.
One minute you're happy, the next you're not.
Unstable is when you're trying to live a normal life on a normal day
but then you stop and remember something,
a thing that triggers another thing inside you
and then you look around then everything seems darker
everything seems to be duller
and you just seem miserable and sadder.
Unstable is when you're trying to find meaning to life,
when you seem to be happy with life.
It's when you're fighting to have hope
but deep inside you know it's for nothing
because some things are just not meant to be
yet you do anything to win
you do everything to keep it in
and you were doing great
so far so good, almost there, just a bit more.
But then it breaks out
and everything you've been holding out during the day breaks lose
and you just realized you've lost.
You're monster took over you one more time.
Unstable is when you care so much for a person,
too much that you don't wanna care anymore.
It's the perfect mix of depression and anxiety.
Wanting someone to be there for you
but pushing them away because you're unstable
and you being unstable means them having to handle a ticking time bomb,
never knowing when you'll be at your wost
and how much of a hassle you'll be.
Unstable might be you, might be me.
It might be anyone who's reading this.
Unstable is helping those who are on the same path,
staying strong to be someone else's strength
but breaking down on themselves
because they couldn't be saved as much as they wanted to be.