What do you want to be?

She asked me.

I’m clueless, wondering, and out of mind as I walk in  the corridor of this unknown hospital.  I’m pretty sure it is a hospital because everything I see is white and in white. “Doc, wait! Mr. Doctor? Doc!” He keeps on walking away without even looking back at me. And I was like, “what’s the matter with this guy?”

“He’s deaf.” Someone said it behind my back.

As I turn around, there she is, a girl holding a glass of whiskey with lots of colorful tattoos on her body that were revealed because she’s wearing white sleeveless shirt and shorts.

“What? How come a deaf can be a doctor? And are you a nurse?” I asked.

“Why? Is it hard to believe that a freak like him is a doctor?” She replied at me while looking at me like I was in a hot seat.

“Uhm, I didn’t call him a freak but you did.” My excuse.

She responded, “Hmm, even though you didn’t directly say it, I know that’s what you are thinking.”
So I felt a little shame for myself because she was right. “If you really can read minds what am I thinking right now?”

She answered “Ice cream.”

“What about now?”

“Computers.”

“Now?”

“Peter Piper pick a peck of pickled pepper, a peck of pickled pepper, Peter Piper picked. If Peter Piper pick a peck of pickled pepper, where is the peck of pickled pepper that Peter Piper picked?”

“Whoa! You’re awesome.” I am really amazed so I want more.

“Last one! What am I thinking right now?”
She replied,“Honey, it’s a bad thing. And stop doing that thing.”

“Wow! I’m impressed. How come can you do that? Ca-can you teach me how?” I excitedly asked her.

But she just replied and smiled at me saying “You can do it too someday, but not now. You know what, I’m a freak and I’m proud to say that because that’s what makes me exceptional. You see that doctor? His disability is not a hindrance to do something that many of us thought he can’t do. Don’t you know that there’s a pilot without hands and only uses her feet to fly a plane?” She replied.

“Well, you’re right but I don’t know if there’s really pilot that can fly a plane without hands but I think I should go now. Nice meeting you ma’am.” I’m about four steps away but I stopped when she asked me something.

“What do you wanted to be?”

So I replied, “I wanted to become a pop star, singing in front of millions of people, strumming my guitar and even when I sing a nonsense song, the crowd will still cheer. Yeah, that’s what I want.”

Then the girl in white replied while smirking, “Be careful of what you wish for, honey. Fame is the greatest drug that you don’t want to be got addicted to.”

Still, while I’m walking ahead slowly, there she is, inclining on the wall singing “They tried to make me go to rehab I said, no, no, no. Yes, I been black but when I come back, you'll know, know, know.”

Then there is a little cute boy, dressed up like cupid crying while approaching me.

“Hey, little buddy. What happened?” I asked him.
He replied sobbing, “Have you seen Amy?”

“Ahm, I don’t know who she is, but what does she look like?”

“You don’t know Amy? She’s pretty, and a great singer. She always drink whiskey, she has tattoos, very nice tattoos in her body.”

“Oh yeah, I’ve seen her. She’s standing there in the hall, just turn right and you’ll find her. Is she your mother?” I asked again.

“No, she’s my girlfriend. Seriously you don’t know Amy Winehouse. She and I are perfect couple” he proudly replied.

Wait, am I mistakenly heard him wrong or did he just really said that he is Amy Winehouse’s boyfriend?

“How come? You’re just 4 or five years old I think, and don’t you know that Amy Winehouse is dead since 2009?” I said it to him while I’m a little bit laughing.

“What? Who told you that I’m an infant? I’m older than your great grandfather, buddy. And yes we got together since 2009 when she died in her bathroom.” He replied to me with his voice changed into a masculine man.

And on that point, I just realized that I just talked to Amy Winehouse. O shhh! I’m stupid, I should take some pictures with her! Well, it’s not too late I know where to find her.

It’s pretty cool to know that I have a sixth sense, I can talk to ghosts, not just ghost but celebrity ghost.
“You’re wrong about what you are thinking again, you cannot see me or Amy unless you are dead too.” The boy with a bow and arrow can read my mind too but the most shocking thing to hear is that I really don’t have a sixth sense, as a matter of fact, I’m dead.

“Wait, did you just say that I am dead? Silly, don’t fool me, I don’t believe you if I’m dead why can I walk like a real man? I know ghosts are just floating.” I justified my answer.

But he just blew my mind as he told me to look down my feet. I chased my breath, I saw Earth beneath my feet. I’m floating. Meaning, I’m really dead.

“O, man, I’m dead,” I muttered.

“Yes, you are.” The boy whispered to me.

The clouds formed a sentence, as I’ve read it, it said: “Mirror, mirror on the sky, show me how I die.” Then a cinema screen-like appeared, there is a reminder before the film starts.

“Ace, you are in heaven, a minute here is equal to one year on Earth, you have stayed here for almost 15 minutes. You do the math. Everything that you will witness is the happenings for the past 15 years after your death.” I don’t know how to feel but I’m excited.

2025, eight years after I died, Vilma Santos is elected as the president and her Vice president is Vice Ganda. And in 2029, Mocha Uson is elected as senate president. Then in 2020, Rodrigo Duterte had died due to a heart attack. And seeing that things happened, I’m glad to know that by the year 2017, I’m already a corpse. 2032, I saw Sarah Duterte will be the vice president of Leni Robredo. But there is one thing that I’m waiting to see, the scenario of how and why I died.

And in EDSA road, a man wearing a helmet is driving his motor 180 kilometers per hour, he’s fast as the wind, he almost hit the old woman on the street but he just continues his driving. But a big truck has lost its break that hit the man on the motor, the body of the man had thrown 10 meters from the motor and his phone played Amy Winehouse’s song Rehab. And then the film had ended.

“What an unlucky way of dying.” The little boy said. “But don’t worry you still have a chance, all things you saw are just sort of trueness and majority of lies.” He added. “You still have a chance. Open that door, go back.” He commanded me.

I twisted the door-knob, slowly. I sneaked in, then I saw myself in a comma. “Yes, you really almost died because of the accident between you and the truck.” Said by the little boy.

Then everything had flash back to my mind.
“What do you wanted to be! What do you want to do with your life? Just play video games and make your balls bigger? You’re not a kid anymore! You are putting in disgrace this family!” mom said to me.

  “Is this what you called a family? Come on, Mom! We’re not the only family that dad has, everyone around me is seeing you as a mistress! If you don’t want me, I don’t want you either!” after that, I’ve driven the fastest that I could. Runaway. No turning back.

“You and your mother had fought about your career in life.” The little boy sadly said.

“Your mother loves you than anyone else. She just wants the best for you. I should know because her heart and yours are connected.” He added.

The water from my eyes just fell like an open faucet. Regrets. I need a time machine, I need a magic mirror.

“You don't need those, you just have to make your second chance worthy. Love your mom. Value your life.” He motivated me.
It’s funny to think that a five-year-old like is giving me a lesson. Maybe we just have to die sometimes to know that we are alive. Death is what gives life meaning.

“What do you wanted to be?” He asked me.
“I wanted to be found,” I answered.
“Hello? Hello. Anybody home?” everything I see is white and in white.