What if...

"I think we should...", she said while staring right into my eyes.

I shouted out, "Oh no! No! We can't do this right now." 

Suddenly the lights seemed a bit dimmer, everything seemed jumbled up. A crumbling feeling prevailed in my heart. I was hyperventilating. She was still staring at me, waiting for a reply.

She mumbled, "It will be hard for me too, but this is what is best for us."

I had never wanted a time machine so badly before.

The memories of our three and half month old relationship way back still clouded my mind as I walked up to the stairs of the building where she presently lived.

Both of us were in the tenth standard, in the same section. From friends to being closer, until the night I proposed to her over the phone. We were good before, we became awesome together. I believed we were special and I wanted everything to be right for us and between us. I wanted a common future for us. I really did. 

Fate rarely grants what you wish for. It becomes more rare if they are your innermost ardent desires. Both of our parents gained knowledge of us together. Home didn't feel like home anymore. Frequent clashes with parents resulting in a curfew-like state with your phone out of your reach and a "no communication with that girl" clause placed on your head. Sometimes you might wonder whether conservative minded people still exist in the 21st century. You should have seen the people who became the reason of our breakup. 

We broke up. We had to grow distant. She took the initiative, I obliged though I was not ready . We had an understanding. We realized that it would have happened eventually. It would be more painful later on. We agreed on being just friends. We both knew it was not possible. The next few months became something of the sort of a survival story. I missed her terribly. I hoped she missed me too.

I reached the second floor of the building. She lives on the fourth. I continued climbing the stairs.

We went on our separate ways. Different schools, different colleges. Eventually we got disconnected. I tried to move on, but our memories were like quicksand, keeping me trapped in the hopes of a new start - when we could not be stopped, when we would not be afraid of taking the next step. I believed that one day either she would come back to me or I will go back to her.

Social networking sites helped me in finding her. I was never a social media person, but I really thanked them in my mind for helping me out. My hopes were rekindled when I found out she was still single. Perhaps she still waited for me. Life has no meaning without hope.But even the smallest ones can make you do crazy things.

I reached the fourth floor. I checked my watch. It was 9:47 am. 

"Oh my god! Is it too early in the morning? Should I show up like that now, after so many years? Would she remember me? How would she react? Oh my god why am I suddenly feeling like a stalker? What if she is seeing someone? Social media can be wrong. After all she was pretty secretive always!" Thoughts raced my mind. By the time I was in front of her apartment door, I was sweating. Controlling nervousness was never my forte.

Suddenly I heard faint music through the door. It took me less than a millisecond to realize which song it was. How can a person forget the song on which he met his true love! It was our song.

There was not a moment to lose. It was now or never! I wiped off my sweat with my handkerchief and pressed the bell. 

That would have been the least time anybody took to open the door in the world. She was expecting me!

"What took you so long? Had you planned on keeping me waiting for the rest of my life?" There were tears in her eyes. She looked beautiful.

"But, then the song....", I mumbled.

"I saw you from my balcony when you were entering the building."

She lovingly fell into my arms. I held her tight.