Will I??

I'm trying
I'm trying to breathe
But now that I'm tired,
My eyes are closing, I can't resist
My lips are dry
My hands are shaking,. Still I do try
After all these that happened
I have no seeds in my hands to think  someday
- I may enjoy my garden..

No...

Now my garden is full of dry leaves, thorny flowers and bitter fruits.
No sunrise that found,
No hope that found,
The tears I shed grown all weeds .
Will I get my seeds back?
Will I get those green leaves back?
Will I get the sweet fruits that people say exist
Will I get those?
Will I?