almost

If you could go back and fix the past, what would you do?

If I could go back, I will turn away for sure. Turn away from the poison of your eyes that makes me lose my mind whenever I look at you.

I will never smile back to your dangerous lips that makes me drown whenever we kiss.

I will never tell my secrets to your unforgiving soul that lies every time I beg for the truth.

I will never talk to your deceiving words that makes me believe in everything you said.

I will never hang out with you for I already know the limit of our time.

I will never eat with you for you gave me the taste of heaven as we are walking to the gate of hell.

Will never do silly things with you.

Laugh with you.

Cry with you.

For I know, I know these things won't even last.

Maybe,

I could just ignore all the fast heartbeats you gave the first time that we met. No exchange of names, numbers and social media accounts. No sharing of love, touching of souls, and risking our lives in the depths of our love.

If I could go back, I'd probably wished I never met you. For you are just something that I once hold but I cannot have. You are the almost in my world. The almost but never did.

The once a stranger with mysterious eyes that captures me for it wants to be solved and you ended up as a stranger running away with a bleeding hands as you hold my heart.

"Excuse me miss, still there?" I almost forgot a kid is asking me something for their English project.

I replied, "what was that again?"

"If you could go back and fix the past, what would you do?"

I genuinely smiled at her while holding my tears and replied, "If I could go back, I'd still love your father."