Another love, Another loss?

You wore a black kurta when i first saw you on the second floor of my faculty, you were clueless when i asked you to take a picture of the time table which I could have done easily ..... i still remember that one of the pictures were blurred but i kept it anyway.

You caught my eye in the faculty many a times and one day i finally smiled and waved in your direction, you waved back and i was content. I saw you sitting with your friends in the canteen and for once the small space felt like a positive attribute. I asked you  to take my number and text me because i had some work from you and you willingly obliged. I didn't have hope but you texted anyway and i brightened up. We talked and i noticed how childishly vibrant you were, you told me you were in love and blushed via text and i blushed harder at you innocence. We talked everyday and you told me countless details about her which i couldn't see when i saw her.

One day you texted me and told me how her ex had taken admission in your class, you sobbed , I knew what was about to happen, I smiled. Frankly i wasn't much affected actually a little irritated when you talked about how she would come back, but she didn't. One night you said you wanted to talk to me but were shivering so couldn't type, everyone had slept so i put on my broken earphone and asked you to send voice notes. You were crying and saying how broken your life was and how you never got what you wanted. I consoled you and at last told you she wasn't what you deserved and you should sleep and go home. This the next day and i said I'd call but didn't until evening while you asked again and again. So i called you and I consoled you again. We lost touch for a while but I saw your ex with a huge piece of chocolate and she said you gave it to her and were sharing as your aunt had brought it from abroad and i fumed. I texted and complained as joke but you said sorry and said you have an entire tobelerone for me, I was speechless. You delayed for very valid reasons and i sadistically made you feel guilty. We finally met and i saw you outside batla house in a formal pant and shirt. You looked pure and i saw my tainted heart. We talked for the first time for a long time in-person and something in me sparked. We met regularly and something ignited in me whenever someone mentioned your name.

We fight and come back together like yin-yangs. Pieces of a puzzle who don't make sense unless together.

I don't know how i have become Ranbir Kapoor and you have become Anushka Sharma of the movie 'Ae dil hai mushkil' where you want us to be best friends and i want us to be lovers. I want to spend my life with you and you want to spend your entire life being my best friend. You say love has done nothing but hurt you while I am your strength and your love for me as a friend is far greater than your love for her ever was. But i cannot help but ask myself the same question, what does she possess that i don't?, why was she capable of being your lover.

I have come to hate cafe coffee day because you told me you don't love me there I cannot look at that place the same way now, I hate it because you told me you are leaving me there. You cannot do anything nor can I. But the truth still stands doesn't it, you have so many best friends and i know you will find more, who woudn't want to be friends with a kind person like you.But i hope even though it seems impossible right now that i get over yo and stop searching for you in every person i meet now.