Benchmark

I sit on that park bench every evening for the past few years now- eyes open, hands clenched, mind freed and heart closed.
I sit and wonder about those ninety-nine mistakes that changed my life, and stop myself from doing the hundredth.
I sit and recall that beautiful lie; everytime I lived that lie, I had to part with a part of me. Oh, that lustful lie! I could deal with my soul to live that lie, again and again and again.
How easy it was to part with my own self then! So vulnerable to every emotion that they shattered every inch of my being everyday, everynight. My life was a slave to my vulnerability.

I treasured in this park hundreds of my evenings. In some of these evenings, people tried to share my bench. Some tried to share my thoughts. My smile politely denied interactions. The chirping of the old banyan tree behind my bench, scolded me like my old grandmother for being impolite. But, my thoughts are mine, my pains are mine. I can't let my dear pain part with me. And the bench? Let the best one win a seat!