He came back..

It was the time when I thought my life was "almost" perfect. I knew that maybe if I put in some more efforts, I could've made it perfect. But almost perfect, it was enough for me..

Mostly, this is the time when someone comes around and lets you know that, your life can be perfect even without the efforts. That's actually falling in love.

And that's most of times when we do not ask for it, unless of course it's one sided(when we really want it to happen). But other than that, we generally feel okay without it as well.

And yet in my life as well, he came. He came with those deep and dark eyes. Which made me want to swim in them, get to know him, talk to him. And whenever he smiled at me randomly, I felt that whatever I was doing, it had to be awesome. And I used to do it more. I thought that maybe in that moment, my life can be perfect without any efforts. Well, I was wrong.

He came to me, confessing his feelings. And yet, I was the one waiting for him to. He said all of that with utmost difficulty, generally used to ask for help with one of my best friends. But it showed me how much he wanted to be with me, even if his words of compassion or being with me till forever were not true.

It again rises a question inside, why did he choose to be with me? He eventually became the most popular student in our batch. At first, he was known for his interaction, but then he started showing his true colors. And people now know him for his egoistic approach towards everything. His friends were there to support him always, they didn't judge him. But he needed someone to tell him that he's going wrong.

It always bugs me till this date that why he forgot that, why do people forget that- they get things out of their behavior or efforts. They may yearn for it, for years. But when they actually get it, they change. Why? It spoils everything. It was his personality which attracted me to him, not his popularity. To be honest, he became popular after we got together.

At first, I saw pleasure in his eyes for having me. He used to flaunt about me in front of everyone, like I was a possession, his possession. But then he changed. For worse.

People need to know that, it's really not the name we seek, we seek compassion and commitment for that compassion. It may sound so huge, but no. It's easy as hell.

One should just be serious about what he or she is getting into. Because it affects people. It affects you. And you may ignore it for better, but what's the point in hiding?

One needs to be mature about this, it's not a game anymore. It can fill someone's life full of roses or it can make someone drown in one's own thoughts. It's possible that one may never come back from those hollows.

I left him, it was unbearable for me. He said nothing. He did say it was his fault, but he did nothing to mend it. Why did he do it? Why did he took it like nothing?

As we all say, as a confident woman, I should move on. I don't need a man. You're right, I don't. But I do need happiness, which he took away from me. It was the most depressing time for me, putting in efforts for a relationship I knew was only going to end. Because I cared too much now. He left, just like it was all nothing. And it made me angry. I guess, this anger took over all the compassion I had for this relationship. It also took all efforts I tried putting in, and made it to waste. I swear I was so angry, that I didn't question back this time. I didn't question what about that day when you told me that you'll love me till infinity. I guess some infinities are smaller than other infinities.

And as I tried moved on, I realised my time with him was an infinity in some ways. I swam deep in the infinite pool of love. As if coming up would have been almost impossible for me.

But this had to happen, and it did. I made it very clear that if he doesn't realise that he needs to mend his mistakes, then it will be the end. It was his decision of ending it and I followed it.

Today, after all this time of staying apart, he called me. He confessed how much he wanted to be with me again, and loved me. But what's the use now. It was all over right? It is all over.

I didn't shut him out like he did once, but I told him calmly that it's not going to happen. I've moved on.

But what did I get apart from that great deal of heaviness in my heart? When we could have had the stars, I got this moving on. And what did he get? It is the question to ponder about, eh?