Hold on ? Or Let go?

I've broke your heart into pieces
For my own selfish reasons.

Lost friends due to that reason
They all left me and went to you.

I don't know why my fingers were itching
To simply ask if you're okay;
But my heart has other reasons
And those feelings came back up until the present.

I told you I still love you
And you told me you did too.

I asked if we could start over
And you said we can.

I held onto that thin rope,
I held on to your " I love you's"
I held on to us.

What I think it was.

I didn't deny any flaws that I have
I accepted the fact the world hates me for that fact.
I tried and am still trying to mend the things that were once broken by me.

I knew I wasn't your priority
But you are mine.

I don't know anymore
To hold on?
To let go?

But since yesterday that you told me to wait for you
And yet you left me and went to them and didn't even looked back at me.
You didn't even called me to say that you'll meet me again.

Yet you still say that you love me.

I love you. I really do.
But still should I hold on?
Even if I feel Im the only one who's holding on?
Even if im the only one who's fixing this?

You were my last hope.
You were my last string.

Should I hold on?
Or should this be the time for me to let go?

- midori 🌲