My Sunflower Girl (Chap 12)

Living Dead

“Sir umm, sir…” Sanjay couldn’t go far from “sir”; he was having no clue as what was going on in the class. He started twisting his pen in between his fingers and started looking around the room nervously as if answer will itself strike to him from the corners of the room.

“Out of my class.” The old nerd with thick moustaches, hairy ears wearing loose pants that could actually fit two Keshav’s, demanded in a munching cry.

“But sir I was just asking him about induction...” Sanju stammered pointing towards me.

It was Ravi Keahav’s lecture hour. You could either focus on his strange pronunciation of words, trying to decipher their meaning and be prepared for a headache or just pretend to be focused as a tamed dog and let your mind wander. I always preferred the second option.

“Out of the class I said.” He yelled at the top of his voice, throwing the chalk on Sanju which landed on the desk behind us.

Sanju with no choice got up from his seat passing a dirty look at me. He slammed my notebook on the table and went out of the class silently.

“And Nivaan if you are only here to sit and smile, why do you care to come to college? At least in your absence others might study in peace.” Keshav was now on me. I wonder how even anybody could think of studying with his heavy metallic grinder voice in the background.

“Because my parents have paid the fees.” I said the truth but partly with an intention to insult him. Whole class went silent and all the eyes were on me and Mr. Keshav but Kaavya’s eyes were down.

“Paying your college fees was the big mistake done by your parents.” A kid daring to reply him back insulted his manhood making him snap back at me. “Kid” that’s what he thought of us, a kid who should always be under his command.

His grey hairs haven’t given him any maturity, he have failed to understand that the kids at college were mature enough to line up another generation of kids. But it wasn’t his fault; there are people, who love to be authoritative.

“Yeah, after all they weren’t aware of the standards of the professors teaching here.” I said and the whole class chuckled together at my words.

“Enough.” yelled Keshav passing a threatening glare to all other students. “Out of my class or I would make you meet the principal for this attitude of yours.” Hisfinger pointed out towards the door.

I looked hard at him; when nothing works, a bold look always does wonders.

He removed his circular framed glasses and put it on the table and he panted for breath. He yelled and his blood pressure was already in a marathon race. I got up from the seat and silently walked out of the classroom. Mr. Keshav muttered something as I walked out of the class.

I went to the lavatory, it was empty I shut the door from inside and lit a cigarette; It soothes my burning heart.

Colleges are so full love, that even the most f***tards, can negotiate and flirt with the feeling of love. I’m no charmer, even if I dare boast with rude confidence, I’m no charmer, at least not in college. But the silly intruder, Kaavya, she just got little hooked with me.

“What are you trying to prove man? Why can’t you just admit that you like that girl?” He said pushing the conversation further which would lead to nowhere.

He is sitting on his bed working on an assignment and I on the chair beside the window trying to focus on the notes he has made.

“I don’t know why you are so concerned about it.” His speech was irritating me. Sometimes he turned out to be a real regrettable company.

“I’m concerned because I’m your friend and I can see that the girl likes you too.”

No bullshit, little f**** has got a baby crush on Kaavya. I told myself. And it was true.

“There’s nothing like that. You are just complicating it with your vague visions.” I shut the book and throw it onto his bed.

“I wonder how you are surviving with the life you have. No offence but truth is no one really likes you in this college. You have no friends except me, all the time you are sulked, drunk or stoned. If you ask me I can’t even recall the last time I saw you happy.”

I fell silent. There was no use of carrying on the conversation. I pull a cigarette out of the pack and light it. I wonder would Meera still like me or if I ever meet her again will she find me same.

“Sanju, I’ll make love to her, wild passionate love to her, for you.” I close my eyes, taking a deep puff of cigarette. “Happy!”

“Really, look who speaks?” He laughed. He knew me far better than I thought of him.

I couldn’t help smiling. Look who speaks!

“You are pathetic. Go, ask her out.” I chide him.

“Oh, I surely I won’t. And about you, though you are alive you are dead. You are practically a zombie, who doesn’t eat humans.”

“Just fuck off.” I hissed throwing the cigarette butt out of the open window. I stand up from the chair and leave the room. “A dead corpse.” I hear him shout as I walk out of the room.

I wonder if it’s just me or the whole world is sick. Nobody can imagine of being himself and it is impossible with people being so nosy in others business.

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