The Conflict of a Lingering Love

I remember it vividly, the day I fell in love with you. It was a simple yet a special day for me. It was the first time that I felt so much appreciation for myself. I remember those days that I pictured myself being with you. I drew it in a paper and I was so happy that I made a good picture with you. I remember those days that I spent with you, for me it was enchanting. You were like a magic spell that makes me become myself. 

You were the one, I always knew that. I love you so much that I can't help but to fell in love with you again and again. It was hard for me to let you go. It's impossible. I regretted that day that I have to let you go. It was hard for me but I must leave you behind.

It's been 7 years since that day we met. Whenever I see traces of you, I can't help but fall in love with you again. But there is a part of me, a part of me that starts to feel the love for something else. That something else is making me become someone else. Say, will I ever be with you, when I'm with something else? I'm confused of myself right now. If I could separate myself in two, I want to be with you and something else. Will you wait for me? Do I have to let go of you forever? My love for still lingers in my heart. Say, will you answer me? If loving was easy for me, I must have been with you right now. How much I wanted to say I'm sorry for breaking myself. Say, will there be a time and privilege for me to love you forever? 

If were given a chance to be with you, If I could be with you without any contradictions, I'll choose you to be with me. I'm so sorry for not having the privilege of loving you right now. I'm sorry to leave you behind for now. I hope you'll wait for me. I hope that you'll understand me and say "Welcome back!". My heart and my soul will always keep my lingering love for you.