THE ONLY CURE

I was sick, sick of waiting, thinking, worrying and hurting. I kept trying to find out why I was feeling like this everyday... as each day passed by, that feeling just got worst.

My friends tell me that I was depressed, that it was all in my head, that I was just over thinking things. Why was I depressed? what made me depressed? How did I, an organized, well-planned out young lady who used to be so open, enthusiastic, happy and disciplined turn out to be so crazy, disoriented, and depressed? 

I've had too much of my seemingly perfect life that I realized I wasn't really happy, that something was always missing. No matter how much friends and loved ones comforted me, there was this one thing I always seek for, I believed that it would makes things better and complete. I try to distract myself with other people, I tried to go out and see other people and just base my happiness on so much people, but being with you just cures everything that I feel, every time I'm with you, it just feels like a breath of fresh air.

You're the cure to the sadness I feel every time you're not around. You're the cure to this depressing world I am in right now. You're the cure to my pain. You're the cure to my sickness, when you're there, you just end the thinking, stop the worrying, aid the hurting and you make the wait worth it. You just make everything seem so light and happy again, you cure this feelings I'm feeling, you stop these crazy thoughts that run in my head.

You're the only cure because you caused it, you left and I missed you so much and all those feelings just got into me and I got carried away. I don't know if I should blame you for doing this to me? or should I blame myself for allowing you to do this to me?  I don't know if you really didn't notice that you were hurting me but now I want you to know that you did hurt me, every second, minute, hour and moment of everyday since the day you left. 

I felt like a crazy person because I did things that were really not me, I did things that I would soon regret. I feel so stupid because I did it and you were one of the reasons why. I mad at myself because I got my friends and worried and I didn't really bother to care about their feelings because I was too busy to get your attention, to get you to fall in love with me again. 

You just killed every good song in my head and replaced it with sad, depressing and broken ones. You made me face the dark side of the world and made me go through it alone. You made me feel all the pain, the worst pain I ever felt so far in my entire life. You made me look like a person who was crazy because they started suggesting me certain people to help me cure this "sickness" but I don't think it would work because I knew what was the cure and it was you--- you're the only cure for these extremely sad feelings and "silently loud" sobbing every night. You were the only one who could bring me back to life in this very lifeless side of the world. 

You are the reason, you are my cure.